Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

NC - toxic, negative mum

6 replies

StrongerThanIThought76 · 09/01/2019 20:30

Just that really. Have had a tricky few years with my mum, we've had counselling but she remains hostile, volatile, offensive, guilt-inducing. And the negativity - oh my - nothing I say or do is good enough despite me busting a gut as a full-time single parent with a full time job. My mental health has hit absolutely rock bottom and after a particularly traumatic conversation this weekend I'm done.

I just can't do it. I can't do any more to be a better daughter (human, mother, employee, sibling etc), I can't apologise for things beyond my control, I can't be the sounding board for everything wrong in her world, I WON'T be the offspring that's tried their hardest and had to take a step back whilst my sibling isn't involved yet is beyond criticism. I cannot have her self-fulfilling negativity bringing me spiralling down any further.

OP posts:
Singlenotsingle · 09/01/2019 20:33

So be it. Just go lc and let her get on with it. Job done.

foxstar3 · 09/01/2019 23:16

Well done

My mother is the stuff of nightmares. Psychotherapist said I had worse parents he'd ever heard of.

Sabotage, cruelty, manipulation. Ended with her trying to bankrupt me in high Court and take ridiculous grandparent rights one weekend per month and all school hols of our 3 kids (happily married). Urgh

Sometimes you just can't win. I think there's quite a few horrible mothers around. My friends are around 50/50 between ok or good to terrible. Until you're honest with people u don't realise they hardly see/ avoid there's or actually don't speak.

Gemzybelle · 09/01/2019 23:18

Best thing I ever did. I don't regret it or miss the 'relationship' one bit, in fact my life is far more peaceful and happier without my family in it. Sad but true

GobblersKnob · 09/01/2019 23:23

You sound like me and my relationship withy mum. I'm sorry, it's really hard. I have been NC for long periods of time. But she generally managed to slice her way back in. We are ultra low contact atm. Tbh I have almost no contact with my family.

NK1cf53daaX127805d4fd5 · 09/01/2019 23:24

I am in a very similar position and posted on the stately homes board tonight. You have my sympathy it is an awful feeling

BumbleBeee69 · 09/01/2019 23:37

Well done OP, it’s a decision you reach after you knock on the door of breaking point. You must consider and prioritise your own mental wellbeing.

Stay strong and focus on your own happiness.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page