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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Resenting partner

7 replies

Pinkybutterfly · 07/01/2019 00:47

Good night... I am a very sensitive person, my parents didn't provide an stable childhood as they have alcohol issues. I left home as soon as I could. Have eating problems and low self-esteem. Last year my best friend killed herself apart from dad having a stroke, my sister attacked me in front of my children, I had a very traumatic c section that went infected and couldn't look after my babies for a couple of weeks... And at has just added up and I feel like all my life I have been there for everyone, the good person... But when I need someone for me everyone lets me down, my partner is not an exemption. He is very tough and doesn't understand how I feel even when I tell him how emotionally exhausted and drained I feel. I get it is hard to put yourself in someone elses shoes specially mine... But I just want to be able to relax for once in my life and have the certainty that someone is watching my back, that is safe for me to relax and sleep and leave all the crap I suffered behind. A safe place... What can I do to feel better what am I doing wrong?

OP posts:
SparklyMagpie · 07/01/2019 00:52

I'm very sorry to hear whay you've been through OP Flowers

If your partner isn't supportive then I think the best thing to do, is to end it.

Have you sought any therapy for yourself?

X

sirmione16 · 07/01/2019 00:53

Sounds to me you've a lot of unresolved issues. You've been very strong. Keep being so. But sounds like you need counselling to work through and sort what you've experienced in your life and make peace with it all. Sometimes partners can't provide that, it has to be a professional. Best wishes

Pinkybutterfly · 07/01/2019 00:57

Thanks for the flowers xxx I am starting councelling in a few weeks time but I am scared of letting out all the crap I have inside... I look very strong but I am very fragile inside at the moment I feel broken and I am not sure I can pick up the pieces. I am not depressed but I feel I'm heading that way

OP posts:
sirmione16 · 07/01/2019 01:18

@Pinkybutterfly what's good in your life at the moment OP? Why do you love your DH? What makes you smile? What do you enjoy?

We're not professional counsellors here (some might be idk) but tell us about what you love right now :) just for tonight, let's focus on the positives for a bit.

Banana1979 · 07/01/2019 01:25

Show him this thread maybe itll push him into seeimg what you are going through

Yellowpanther · 07/01/2019 02:12

He is working, sent him this an hour ago. I am crying, I have lots of things inside me, many things I haven't told you and many things I don't think you could ever understand. I am not ok. I feel l am broken and not sure how I can pick up the pieces. His answer just now: We can talk about it when you're ready. Try to sleep

Yellowpanther · 07/01/2019 02:22

I called him and asked if he is ok, he is on his break, if I was him I would have called me or at least send me kisses or something. Specially because before sending that message I sent him a poem. I think is time for me to leave him

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