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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

When’s best to tell the kids?

1 reply

PlantagenetQueen · 01/01/2019 23:13

Hello, new to Mumsnet and seeking some advice from those who may have been in this situation. My DH and I decided to separate a few weeks ago (we’ve drifted apart, he had an emotional affair, we don’t like each other much anymore) but haven’t yet told our teenage kids. Some friends and family do know about our decision but I feel rotten that we haven’t told the kids yet (though probably they have their suspicions). DH says it will break their hearts, my mother says it’s too cruel to do at this time of year (Christmas and all that), I want to get it over and done with but don’t want to be seen as the bad guy who “destroyed” the family. Husband, whilst agreeing to an amicable separation initially, seems now to be terrified by the reality of the situation and it feels like it’s up to me to drive things forward, but when is the right time? Is there ever a right time? DS who is already emotionally quite fragile, has GCSEs this year, and I don’t want to add to his stress levels. Should we just carry on as we have been, keeping it from the kids until the summer? Any advice gratefully received.

OP posts:
OhioOhioOhio · 01/01/2019 23:20

Just tell them. Being kept out of a secret is cruel.

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