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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

differentiating abusive behaviour from bipolar symptoms

2 replies

fluffums · 01/01/2019 20:27

Just wondered if others with bipolar relations can give me any guidance on how to tell the difference between bipolar symptoms and abusive behaviour? And how to tackle abusive behaviour coming from a bipolar person?

A close family member was this year diagnosed with BP but historically looking back has always behaved like a jeckyll and hyde character you have to tread on eggshells around if he's in a bad mood, behaving like a spoiled, entitled brat with a black cloud over him.

Over Xmas he was particularly bad, but we avoided confrontation because we didn't want an escalation of his condition (he was also undergoing a medication change). I wondered if Xmas stress was exacerbating his condition, or if he's just again being the spoiled brat I always think he has behaved like. Or if he's a spoiled brat because of the bipolar (??).

I think it's been undiagnosed a long time so maybe it was latent all that time? Still I can't excuse the spectacularly out of order behaviour that he subjects us all to. He is oblivious to being out of order and thinks everyone else is the issue when challenged.

Any advice welcomed - thank you!

OP posts:
fluffums · 01/01/2019 20:30

PS for anyone who is bipolar out there I apologise in advance, I don't think everyone is like this who has the condition, but am just trying to work out if in his case the illness is the cause of much of his horrible behaviour over the years....? Or if he's just a nasty piece of work on top? Or a bit of both? (I have a complete lack of experience of the condition so this is a learning curve for me!).

OP posts:
Musti · 01/01/2019 20:34

I had an ex with bipolar. No abusive behaviour at all. Just very low times and manic times. Hard to love with but wasn't abusive.

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