So confusing

[purplepigs]

Have recently found out that a friend of mine was having a relative with their teacher for the last 2 and half years of school

They are both married now to different people

But still talk
Still meet

I am in shock

Yes, it is shocking. We are supposed to be able to trust teachers. You can of course trust most but these happenings are not uncommon.

As they meet up and talk, I have to say it sounds as though they did have a real relationship and now, a friendship.

I can't get out of my head the image of a teacher chatting up (& more) a sixteen year old but what's done is done. Was he quite a young teacher?

Nothing you can do, purplepigs. Does your friend know that you know? If she doesn't, please tell her, gently and kindly, and hear what she has to say. You can't make her do that of course but give her the chance, you may find her story is different to the gossip you heard.

Then carry on as before and don't bring the subject up again but be prepared to listen if she does.

I'm assuming you mean relationship

Who do you feel is accountable here, the adult teacher or the adolescent pupil?

@jessstan2 It came out in a conversation and I was like WHAT and apparently it's all true. Starting at the beginning of sixth form 2 years on she left school continued for another 6 months then stopped because it had to as where else does it go. As it's a job loses. So it happen 16 to 18 and a half.
She idolised him
Him her - not too sure

But they still talk now
Text message every week
All this time have passed yet they r still in contact
That take some effort on both

He is married
Two kids
But unhappy at time
Regrets his life decisions his says

@NotTheFordType yeh relationship sorry
Not sure how to edit post now
Any ideas

Accountable
The teacher no doubt
You

This is mumsnet, you can't edit!

He sounds like an absolute scum bucket.

What do you want to do/say to your friend?

@NotTheFordType
I want to ask her what she gets out of this all.
By talking to him.
Knowing he is married with 2 children
It doesn't makes sense to me

The fact he has groomed her since she was a child means her answers to your questions won't make sense.

She needs to address the issue of him abusing her before she can start to think about emotional affairs etc.

@NotTheFordType u think he groomed her ..... she tells me she was doing most of the running

The flirting

???

He was an adult in a position of trust
She was a child

Do you think children groom adults?

@NotTheFordType no certainly not

@NotTheFordType May be it wasn't a one off