Anyone else feel unloveable/broken?

[Notamum400]

I know that superficially there’s nothing wrong with me - petite, red hair, curvy with a decent rack. I did better with men before the Kardashian arse obsession came along! I’ve had relationships but they’ve never been love. I’m not sure what love is? I’ve had shit tons of counselling so stopped self sabotaging, blaming, acting like a victim. I had a not so great childhood and some shit relationships but no longer put up with tests. I’ve got plenty of friends, hobbies, I travel on my own and I’m not waiting around for my Prince Charming! I’m mid 30’s - can I find love? Is it me? Is it everyone else?

Not tests - twats!

Interested in this as I feel the same way! I also fill my time and have stuff to do, but totally get the unlovable feeling as nothing really replaces a romantic relationship.

If I am honest I think it comes down a lot to luck.

BUT...you've also got to be in it to win it. Are you dating?

Endlessly dating @partypopper2. Tried all the apps, tried meeting in real life. I don’t have a set checklist apart from decent human being and don’t necessarily believe that the first time I meet someone there should be a thunderbolt

I am the same! I don't know what I am doing wrong...except maybe i've just not met him yet. How long have you been single?

Been single about 5 years! But definitely never in love during a few short relationships and one long term one. It’s reassuring to know it’s not just me!

Although it looks like it might just be the two of us 😞

It’s not just you and I’m 35 in a couple of months. Counselling has helped but I’m still single and don’t know how to meet someone. Never been with a man who loved me.

Oh and the little kids I used to teach used to call me Kim Kardashian years ago as they thought I looked like her - hasn’t given me much luck with men! Red hair is beautiful imo.

It’s just crap @shadylady53. Doesn’t help that some of the most horrendous people I know are in love and have kids 😥.
If a Kim K lookalike can’t find love there’s no hope for the rest of us!

@Notamum400, Lol, I wouldn't say I was a look alike and I didn't take it as a compliment haha - I was like "Are you saying, I look fake and have a huge bum?!" I don't like the fake, plastic look at all. Without makeup, I suppose she does look like a young version of my very beautiful grandmother who passed away many years ago though. My other very beautiful grandmother was a red head and apparently all the men in the village were in love with her. Times seemed much simpler back then.

I doubt our problems are looks related at all to be honest. Some of the most beautiful people I know are single. Others who aren't conventionally attractive had no problem finding someone.

I completely know what you mean. I really want children and some of the nastiest people I know are engaged or married and have kids. Its hard. You just feel like - where did I go wrong?!

Completely agree - it’s more complicated than looks. I just don’t understand - but maybe I’m not capable of love? Maybe I’m not loveable?

I thought I wasn't capable of love until I fell in love for the first time at 29! You probable are capable of it but have barriers up. Have you looked into attachment styles? How much do you know about how you were parented in early childhood?

I think, unless someone is a truly evil person (paedophile, killer etc), that everyone is loveable. Feeling that way about yourself is easier said than done, especially if you have attachment trauma.