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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

I've screwed things up so bad

12 replies

wurlywurly · 27/06/2007 09:25

Have been chatting to someone on msn, nothing more then friendship.

Apparantly i said his name in my sleep last night and dh heard me.

Everything is such a mess.

OP posts:
lulumama · 27/06/2007 09:26

Does your DH know you have been talking to him?

what did he say to you ?

littlelapin · 27/06/2007 09:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
wurlywurly · 27/06/2007 09:29

yeah told dh last week that i had been talking to this person,said it was no different then the female friends that he talks to.

OP posts:
lulumama · 27/06/2007 09:30

so then why is it such a mess?

LilRedWG · 27/06/2007 09:31

I woke up one night about a month after we were married, looked at DH and thought, 'What the hell is your name?', couldn't remember and said "I love you Darren!" Needless to say, his name isn't Darren - Darren was somebody I worked with (same height and build).

Luckily DH is an understanding chap and just replied that he loved me too and to go back to sleep.

It's our tenth wedding anniversary in December and he still teases me about it He also points out that if it'd been the other way around, I would have gone ballistic and probably divorced him!

Saying names in your sleep just means that you are thinking about something or dreaming, it doesn't mean you are unfaithful!

Original poster
wurlywurly · 27/06/2007 09:31

he thinks i've been seeing this person, which i havent.

OP posts:
throckenholt · 27/06/2007 09:33

people say all sorts of things in their sleep - doesn't mean anything rational (I was on the run this morning in my dreams - woke up trying to work out how I could survive with no official identity ).

talk to him about it - talk about having platonic friends - ask him if he prefers that you each have to censor everyone the other knows.

Hope things calm down soon.

LilRedWG · 27/06/2007 09:33

Sound a bit like double standards to me. It is fine for him to chat to other women but not for you to talk to other men! Of course, he could just be terribly insecure and need some reassurance that it is him that you love and no-one else.

lulumama · 27/06/2007 09:34

if he knows you have been chatting to him, and been open about talking to him, it is a big leap to you actually having an affair?

you need to spend some serious time talking with DH

littlelapin · 27/06/2007 09:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
wurlywurly · 27/06/2007 09:41

no never met him, just someone that i speak to, i have no feeling for him at all.

OP posts:
binkleandflip · 27/06/2007 09:42

Then it will blow over I'm sure.

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