Ok I am looking for impartial advice....maybe it's Christmas or the first time I have had so much thinking time since the breakup but I'm beginning to think he was a sh**t
I broke up with my ex the week before my birthday which was in October. It was a milestone birthday and one I did not want to mark. Yet from May he insisted I did. He was taking me away, no ifs or ands or buts. Reluctantly I agreed and we planned to go Paris, something which I was to leave with him. I'll come back to that but first we had been dating (quite seriously for year), but in that time he was so very tight, I mean so tight I genuinely gasped in horror at times. Any other time we did anything or went away I was obliged to pay my half, which he took from me right down to the exact penny every time. Just to add I went back to uni last year and was living on a measly grant, that barely covered bills yet alone much else. This was something he knew about but as it was a quick one year post grad I figured the end justifies the means and would be worth it in the end. Often I decided not to do things as I couldn't afford to and he happily didn't do them too. * Even with my course and new job he earns twice as much as me as a student he was likely on 10 times as much* yet he was always looking for ways to whip any extra pennies away. He never batted an eyelid at my getting payday loans to make ends meet. The penny pinching was unbelievable and I have never seen anything like it. However I am digressing, I awaited our October (birthday) trip and guess what? 2 weeks before, guide books bought, friends family, work, pet sitters informed he said it was too expensive. Try as I might to forget this, the numerous other sometimes minuscule ways he avoided spending even fifty pence on me got to me. I was so embarrassed yet again, he made promises to do things before and never fulfilled. I tried but couldn't continue with him as it became clear his ex wife and also ex of three years both split for similar reasons. Yes he has had a past that was also difficult to over look but I was doing my best, after all we were no spring chickens....On top of that I found out 3 weeks before we split that I was pregnant. He was apparently over joyed. I took a bit of getting used to the idea. Anyway we split, went our sep ways and I haven't heard from him since. That was over 2 months ago. We split over whatsap where I told him that I felt he had let me down one too many times and i was out. He asked for his key back and said 'to think of all the money I wasted on your present'' and that was that. That was over two months ago. Since then I have found out that my little girls has downs, I feel so alone and the fact that he has not once asked how the baby (his child is) cuts like a knife. Now after my lengthy post I guess I am asking is he a sh*t? Or is it me? I cannot help thinking perhaps I have seen too much Jeremy Kyle but regardless of what is happening with parents it's not about them anymore when a child is involved. It has been a tough pregnancy and is set to get worse and it hurts that he didn't ask about her