Seventh Christmas on my own...

[MulledWineAndCamembert]

That's it really.

Split up with my exhusband in the run up to Christmas 2012 and, aside from a few dates and very short flings here and there, I've been single since.

I have hobbies; I work; I have teenage children; I meet loads of people but very rarely single men and never ones I'm interested in - the single for a reason sort.

I don't even think I'd manage a relationship now as I'm used to being on my own and feel like I'd be 'competing' with the memories; the love; the experiences; the sex and the life of everyone who went before me.

I just don't think I can put myself through it all again.

But I'm only 42. If feels sad to be saying 'that's it' so soon.

Ok. Thank you. I'll look into it.

Just out of interest though, what would a 'right' way of looking at it be? x

The right way of thinking is that if they were a better fit then they'd still be with that person.

The person in question might be better at something but you will be better at something else and the quality that you're better at may be more important to the guy.

But it's not about better - or worse. When you're in a relationship that fits there is no thought of other relationships. At all. If someone is thinking about, or comparing, to old relationships then that person is way off the mark, red flags akimbo. We are not commodities for goodness sake, we're human, with our own distinct essence. In short, we're precious - not a combination of attributes.