Just as the title says really. A bit of a back story, I split up from my ds (3yo) dad nearly 2 years. He in my opinion is an alcoholic and now is using drugs when he drinks.
In the 2 years we have been parted he has let my son down practically everytime. My little boy would be waiting for him and I would find out he was in the pub. I could write a list on what he has done..sent abusive texts, threatened my family with violence, blackmailed me, never contributes financially, he has never bothered with xmas cards/presents for my son. The list is endless. There is more but I’m scared il get outed.
With advice from solicitors and the police I stopped him from seeing my son (he would never be alone with him anyway I would always go into town and meet him when he actually did show up) till he proved he could be a decent person and cut the drink out.
5 months down the line he said he hadn’t had a drink and could I take my son to see him as it was his birthday. We go meet him and he was actually ok. He gave my son a birthday card and promised he was a changed man and could I make arrangements over the xmas so they can spend time together. He promised me faithfully he wouldn’t let him down and we parted ways. That night I got a text message of him with a picture of the tax rebate he is getting (quite a large sum) and with him owing me quite a substantial amount of money he said he would pay a little bit in my bank the next morning.
Fast forward to today, I ask him what time he was paying the money into my bank as I was going to get some last bits of shopping for my son and I was going to use that money. All I get is a barrage of abuse calling me worse than shit, all I care about is money (which is not the case, I haven’t had a penny off him in 2 years towards my son and He owes me a fortune for other stuff) and messages I can’t repeat on here. It’s obvious he’s had a drink and I told him my son wouldn’t be seeing him over Xmas we yet again he’s went back on everything he said. Which again was met by angry messages and threats.
I’m totally at a loss what to do. I feel so selfish stopping my son from seeing his daddy- he absolutely idolises him but I know he’s going to just keep letting him down again and again. Everytime he has money he blows it all and my son is always last on his list. Infact I don’t even think he’s on the list. I promised myself I would give it one last chance for the sake of my son but do I keep going and working on it. I hade the fact I’m god and I really don’t want too.
Can anyone advise me and tell me if I’m doing wrong or right! X