My NC mother just put a card through the door with my ds’ name in children’s writing.

[OverwateredCheeseplant]

Been NC for a year. Despite me requesting no more cards etc from her more than once she still comes to our door and puts cards through for ds on birthdays and Christmas. This time she decided to write his name on the envelope in childlike writing so presumably I wouldn’t know if it was from one of his friends or not. So like a mug I gave it to him and lo and behold inside it’s all gushing using words like ‘darling’ etc.

Being NC is so hard to navigate when there are children involved but she had many chances to not keep having tantrums and she wrecked my mental health over a 30 year stretch. Watched some bastard knock me about and put me down. Last straw was her striding in to ds Xmas play uninvited.

My grandma died last night so I could do without this.

Sorry for your loss.

If they are hand delivered you could make a point of opening them first - you can put them in a new envelope if it isn't from her.

Well. At least she is true to form and helping your resolve.

Agree with opening them first. Maybe also consider keeping them in case you need the evidence if she ramps it up.

Try to forget her and enjoy your Christmas with your babies.

Though that is very hard to do I know.

I’m NC with my parents but they still send cards and gifts to my DC. I open them first then give them to the children. The cards are usually gushing too. I just pass them to the DC saying “look what you’ve been sent by your DGPs, isn’t that nice?” and then try and forget about it. It’s not easy, but I find that as time goes on it gets a bit easier. I really want them to leave us completely alone but I accept that’s not going to happen because of the DC (they have no contact with them with either), so I just have to not let it get to me. helps .