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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Why is this mum staring at me?

40 replies

AnonymousSchoolgateDad · 21/12/2018 01:32

Posting anon as this is a bit embarrassing/revealing for both myself and any other mums who may know me in real life on here. Blush

Currently co-parent with ex-wife (amicably - there was no OW or bad behaviour on my part, she says she just fell out of love), so often do school runs. Over the last few weeks I've started noticing one of the other mums, for want of a better term, staring at me. Basically that: just a fixed stare with a slight smile on her face. Sometimes I give a brief acknowledgment but more often than not its from across the playground or assembly hall and so one or the other of us looks away. She never bothers to come and say "Hi" or anything. Just keep catching her staring.

As far as I'm aware she's single too - her ex seems a good guy and IIRC there might be gossip she got involved with someone else. We never socialised with them bar school events, although my wife may have met up with her after we split.

I'm single and not really looking - just getting my life together after the divorce.

I'm a bit clueless about all this and prone to overthinking stuff, so I guess I'd consult other mums who are more experienced with school gate etiquette. Am I reading too much into this? Or is she eyeing me up? I'm not even sure I'd want to "go there" tbh, but it would be good to at least have a better idea as to what on Earth is going on...

OP posts:
NewHouseFreshStart10 · 21/12/2018 13:03

I love some posters on here, if this was a woman posting the responses would be completely different and it would be a Romeo & Juliet story of your eyes meeting across the playground and you could fall madly in love. But because you're a guy they treat you as some egotistical arsehole who thinks he's gods gift to women, the double standards on here shock me at times.

Try and make some conversation, that's harmless and a good place to start Smile other than that I wouldn't read too much into it or panic, I often find myself staring into space and then see someone look at me funny because I've been staring without realising Blush

Beechview · 21/12/2018 13:22

But if the op said they wanted to get to know her and ask for advice, they would have got it.
They actually said in their op that they’re not looking and not really interested just wondering why they were being started at.
No one knows why.

ravenmum · 21/12/2018 15:46

@Weightsandmeasures In other cases we have descriptions of what people said, what they did, where they went and when, the texts they sent ... Here we have a woman looking at him. It's not the same thing. We have literally nothing to go on. I don't know why you think my reasoning is bizarre.

You say you are going to hazard a guess at why people are being sarcastic, but then fail to share your thoughts in front of the whole class. Are you being sarcastic?

ravenmum · 21/12/2018 15:50

Any remotely negative comment towards a man on here and someone is bound to come up with the old "If this was a woman" comment. I'm rarely sarcastic, but when I am I definitely don't limit myself to men.

Closetbeanmuncher · 21/12/2018 16:06

Being posted by a woman wouldnt have made any difference to me.

Love story? No
12 year old girl secret does he/she fancy me diary? Yes

Confused
Weightsandmeasures · 21/12/2018 16:11

Ravenmum, you can kid yourself that it is not the same thing. That's entirely up to you.

MaidenMotherCrone · 21/12/2018 16:14

Obviously she knows about your secret thingy.Grin

ravenmum · 21/12/2018 16:20

omg how can I live with myself 😂

Weightsandmeasures · 21/12/2018 16:30

omg how can I live with myself

Honestly, I have no idea and I'm not of the right profession to help you with that challenge.

ravenmum · 21/12/2018 16:33

I love it when people come on to tell you off about your behaviour, but do it by being even ruder than you were 😂

Weightsandmeasures · 21/12/2018 16:36

If you love it, then you should be happy, and I'm happy that you're happy.

Orange6904 · 21/12/2018 17:03

I stare a lot, but I think I need to wear my glasses more. I keep saying hell to people I think I know.

Orange6904 · 21/12/2018 17:04

*Hello I mean, not hell like some old pigeon lady Wink

CupsAndPentacles · 21/12/2018 17:08

Dont tell the other mums she was staring at you. That would be setting out to embarrass her

sizzledrizz · 21/12/2018 17:27

What happens if you move nearer to her? IMO when women are attracted to men, they tend not to stare, they will look and look away. Men do the staring thing usually. She possibly knows stuff about you

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