I can't stand him touching me..is it me?

[deena443]

I've been single since 2011.
My longest relationship was 3 months and I'm 35.
I'm forcing myself to date these men to hopefully one day develop feelings but nothing.
I've been dating a guy for 3 months who is such a nice man but I can't stand him touching me.
I don't want to sleep with him but force myself to and after I feel so sad.
I'm going to end it at the weekend because it's not right.
Every guy since 2011 I have zero attraction to them.
I hate kissing them and the thought of sleeping with these men makes me feel just awful.
Can anyone tell me what the hell is going on?

It's quite possible that you are either depressed or even just asexual/demi sexual. Look them up :)
It's quite normal not everyone wants or needs a sexual relationship.

What you are doing isn’t normal and it is very unfair to the men you meet. Stop seeing men until you can figure out yourself first.

I can't tell you what's going on, I think you need to speak to a psychologist or psychiatrist to get a professional opinion as to the reason why you feel this way. In the mean time why are you trying to force yourself to do something that makes you feel sad and awful? Be kind to yourself, if you don't want to date or start a relationship with a man you don't have to. There is nothing wrong with being single and having a lovely relationship with yourself.
& for you

Not everybody wants sex or feels the need stop having sex you don't enjoy it is making you feel worse.

What happened in 2011?

2011 i was seeing someone and he ended it in the worst way possible really and it's almost like I stopped feeling things.
Even before that I used to struggle to find men who I fancied.
All my friends always bang on about men they like but I just struggle to feel things.

About 6 months ago I started liking (I think ) a woman who goes to my fitness class.
I don't know if I like her as a friend or if what I'm feeling is how my friends feel about men.

Well women was going to be my next question.

How do you feel about her? How would you feel about the thought of kissing her or holding her hand or looking into her eyes? "the fact she stands out to you makes me think you do not see her at just a friend.

If you get any vibes back from her, you could just gently pursue it and see how it goes? If it turns out you're a lesbian or bi, it's OK. It only matters that you're happy and safe

So you might fancy this woman at your gym that is ok isn't it ? Have you thought about dating women instead.

If your that repulsed maybe it’s because they are men. Maybe you like women instead?

I don't think sexuality is fixed you like who you like just because you had boyfriends in the past doesn't mean you can't have girlfriends in the future, but you need to stop having sex that is repulsing you .

I've been toying with the idea for a while.
I even downloaded tinder but there's hardly any women in my area.
I have thought wow to a few of them but they've never spoken.
Where would I even meet women.
All my friends are into guys so it's never gonna happen.

It’s a bit pessimistic to say it’s never going to happen before you’ve given it a go, OP!
Take things gently. First take a little time to think about your own feelings and explore whether your orientation is lesbian or bi or asexual. Also consider the possibility that your lack of chemistry and numb feelings toward male partners might just be you “shutting down” to avoid involvement and potential emotional hurt. Then if you do decide you’re gay, maybe look online for lesbian sites or local meet ups, so you can get to know some socially before rushing into dating them.
I hope you find a loving partner of whatever sex is right for you, OP, and that you become comfortable in expressing your real self.

Get on-line and join some forums.
But please stop what you are doing right now.
Stop meeting men.
Stop conforming to what society 'deems' acceptable.
Be you.
Get out there and find yourself.
And get some therapy.