This is my first time writing a post but I had to get this off my chest as I can't take it anymore.
I've been with my partner for almost 6 years, and we have two beautiful boys together aged, 2 and 10 months. I also have a daughter from a previous relationship who loves him dearly. For the last 3 years or so, even since I became pregnant with my two year old I noticed a change in him, but I brushed it off and put it down to nerves as it was his first baby.
Throughout my pregnancy he wasn't very supportive, as it seemed as though he found my sickness, and tiredness and all the rest which I won't go into detail about annoying. Once a had given birth he was amazing with him so I again brushed off all the comments he had made and was willing to start again.
A few months later he changed, he started commenting on the way I was looking after the baby even tho I was an experienced mother and was enjoying my little boy. He would say that his mum said I should be doing this and that and telling me what his sister done for her kids. In a nutshell saying I was doing it wrong (I was so p*** off), in front of his family he'd act like he done everything for the baby when in reality I was, as I was on maternity and he worked 10 to 12 hour days almost 7 days a week!!
I eventually got fed up of the comments, as I done absolutely everything in the house, took care of the kids and cooked everyday. It wasn't good enough he'd come in and find something to say that HE felt I hadn't done.
I told he that I needed a break when my son was 9 months old as it was breaking me I became a nervous reak trying to please him and I wasn't myself I had no confidence and was doubting myself as a mother when I know I'm a good mum.
For three months we separated, I got my confidence back, and I was happy but I missed him. So when he promised he'd change and make more effort, to help in the house etc (I forgot to mention this whole time we wasn't having sex it was like once a month if that, zero affection, compliments, nothing).
So he agreed to change and for a few months he did until I became pregnant again. He was better during the pregnancy, but now my 2nd beautiful baby boy is here we are back at square one x10.
We don't have sex for months only on his terms, he spends zero time with me, even tho I've constantly begged him. He promises to make an effort he never does. He is constantly moody saying his tired I've told him to look for another job as he is there 7 days a week, and he obviously can't manage it, as he just eats his dinner, baths the boys, as its the only time he has with them, then say absolutely nothing to me and go to bed. He speak to me like his irritated with me and is really disrespectful and rude. I'm a strong person so I tell him that I'm fed up and he is causing an atmosphere as soon as he comes home.
He's started moaning at my daughter over everything little thing. And now she can't stand to be around him she loves him but they have lost the bond they had.
I don't know what to do now because I feel like I've tried everything yet still everything on his terms, the family have to work around his work commitments, his moods, and do what he wants or he sulks and creates tention, so its like walking on egg shells.
We have no relationship, I cook, clean, work part time look after the kids, pick them up and drop them to nursery. And theres no effort from him to be intimate, affections, or work on the relationship he's happy the way it is. When I confront him he acts like he doesn't know what I'm talking about. I tried to approach him sexually, make plan for us to go out as a couple, but he always finds a way out of it whether that be saying he has to work or he's tired.
I just don't get way he begged me to get back with him to do the same thing, and more.
NEED HELP AND ADVICE URGENTLY ❤️❤️