Too tired to make myself 21 again

[babycow38]

Been with OH 18 years, we have older DC 19 and 22, on the face of it we have been very successful, weathered the early years, weathered the teens, but I'm so tired of trying to make myself young looking ,I'm 48 and sick to death of dying my hair, putting awful cream on my bits, dying my eyebrows, and just generally trying to keep ,"young"
My OH isn't fueling this, it's all me, I feel left behind, i feel old and I'm only 48! Is 48 old?
I hate the way I look,

I’m sure you are beautiful and embrace it!! You made 2 lovely children. If you are feeling down, have you thought about some eyelash extensions? You can get very natural ones done for around £30 they make such a difference!!

And 48 is not old. Enjoy life as you are

I so understand. When you think about it, it is such a waste of women's time and money.

Try just stopping it all for awhile and see how you feel. You can always start up again later if you want to.

Look up dermapen. It’s affordable and makes the collagen in the dermis repair itself. I noticed results after the first day.

Why sit and feel crappy about something if it can be fixed?

Do you think you need the grooming/styling to help your confidence OP? Or are you so used to seeing this styled up version of yourself you’ve forgotten what you look like as you are ?

Give yourself a month without makeup and I’m sure you will start appreciating your natural self again!

Can you go for highlights rather than full head dye? Or brave letting your silver come through - I’ve started growing my dye out and I’ve about 4
Inches left at the bottom now (shoulder length) - so it is now shot through with silver but it looks better than I thought it would - it suits me !

I’m afraid the only person you need to convince that you are brilliant just as you are is yourself- and I know that can be a lot easier said than done!

Im 45 and the most mainstream look I go for is.
Wait.
Actually I don't go for any!

I'm a sex worker. Men pay £150 per hour for me. (And the occasional woman.)

Its not about how you look. Honestly.

I get you!!

Ive just turned 46 and every time I look in the mirror all I see is my 80 yr old Mum looking at me 😢

I'm single too, and have been for 7 yrs apart from a flaky tinder thing that ripped my self esteem and heart out 😳

I blame it on winter!! I felt pretty good this summer...I hope we have a nice summer in 2019 like we did this year ☀️

Sorry no help, I do know you have to start loving yourself but it's not that easy 😬

I love that the majority’s of responses to your frustration and boredom at trying to look younger are... suggestions of more things to do to try to look younger 😂

Just do what you can and dont do more.
I keep things simpler now. It seems more instinctive.

Are you afraid yr h will judge you for having aged as though he hasnt?
Talk to him and see if he reassures u.
I couldnt head in to the second half of life with a man who had one eye over my shoulder. But u dont say this is the motivation to do more than ur comfortable with.

I am nearly 49! I look just like my mother now, its so depressing. Met DH when I was 17, slim size 8, pretty and toned, 3 kids and 30 years later, size 16, not so much, but then he doesnt look the same either.

I hate putting make-up on but I do, I have given up on the hair dye tho. My face is not wrinkly tho, its the fat padding it out and the HRT, so facially I dont look too bad.

I look like my Father. That is worse!

I love that the majority’s of responses to your frustration and boredom at trying to look younger are... suggestions of more things to do to try to look younger

Yes, agreed.

Getting older is part of the deal, and it often isn't pretty. I think it's something we all go through - if we're fortunate to live that long - and we deal with it in different ways. Which is a long way of saying what you're feeling is normal. How you deal with it will reflect who you are and whether you are more concerned about how others see you, or how you see yourself.

I'm 48 too and all I do is get a good haircut a few times a year and the same make up I've always done which takes 1 minute to do. But I make sure I exercise and eat well and that makes me feel better.

I'm.not sure if I'll start dyeing my hair or just leave it. The guy I'm seeing I think is gorgeous but compared to his younger pics he is different. I don't expect him to look like he did 30 years ago and I'm sure he doesn't expect me to either.

You can look well without looking young.

But it's just ageing, it's normal. Your husband ages too, we all do. We're lucky to get old, some don't

It doesn't sound like you go overboard with your routines, can you not enjoy them more? It sounds to me like you would like yourself less without them! Manicures etc don't matter to me, but nice hair and a quick tweezing of eyebrows really helps!

I think the most important things we do to keep looking young and what we do to look after ourselves (not drink too much, have sleep, eat well, drink enough water) also keeps us healthy and able to get into the older years with.

ahhhh! sent too soon

with minimising health problems so it's a deeper taking care of ourselves.

I'm 48 too and all I do is get a good haircut a few times a year and the same make up I've always done which takes 1 minute to do. But I make sure I exercise and eat well and that makes me feel better.
This ^
Though once a year I have 2 x colours (shades of blond not bleach ) streaks put through my hair.
Light make up.
Light weights every other day.
(Been doing this 3 years)
Walk 2.5 miles per day.
AND since clocks went back half a cup of ORANGE juice every day. (Life changer lol)
Eat well and healthy.
Drink warm water.
(Rarely drink though do havre the odd wine)
At 54 I've never look so well.

You should worry....I see my Gran in the mirror if I turn too quickly! But I am sixty in a few weeks and living my life in a way she couldn't even have dreamed about. And I loved her!

I am 46 and I don’t do anything no creams don’t dye my hair etc I look mid 30s so I have been told...
The only thing I do that is nothing to do with beauty but I am sure because it makes me feel happy and younger on the inside then shows on the outside is dancing I will dance when ever I can around the house out most weekends ...people stare oddly as I dance alone usually but I don’t care and going to start dance classes with my boy in January...it’s about feeling happy within I think!

I'd recommend spending time looking after yourself rather than chasing youth. It ain't coming back, and actually no one is expecting you to make it come back except people trying to sell you something. You have people who care about you and have made a good life. Totally go for it and enjoy beauty, hair, clothes, but in a way that is for you , not anyone else and a way that is enjoyable, not a chore.

I think this is more about the way you feel about yourself and your marriage, your life etc. than how you look. I am almost the same age as you (but with much younger children) and felt the same... until I was very ill for few months. Getting better has made me completely euphoric about being alive at all and I really like the way I look in way I didn't before! Not suggesting you should get seriously ill... but all this stuff starts in our heads and broader lives I think... well at least in my experience as I was completely worn out hence getting ill.

Grow the dye out,get a good haircut..Review your wardrobe and embrace the new you.
So what else do you need to sort out in your life because at 48 your not old.What did you have at 21 that you don't have now apart from outward appearance.Someone happy with life doesn't think to much about age and others don't think about it either in your company.

I think I look younger than my age, I am 54 and I think I would pass for 44 but I don't look particularly well iykwim. I am overweight and too lazy to do much with hair and make up. I get my hair dyed regularly though, and I like the sound of those blond steaks mentioned by a pp, I see you only get it done once a year, just curious but is it to allow the silver to creep in semi naturally? I like the idea of that, might give it a try.

It sounds exhausting, OP. I'm about your age and veer between feeling excited about my 50s, and gloomy when I see women in their 20s and 30s with so much ahead of them.

40s is still young. Think of it this way, you've only been an adult for 30 years, and you've got another 30 years to go.

I wouldn't waste it faffing about with trying to turn back the clock, embrace who you are now - as in, who you are inside, and what you're doing in life, and what you want to do. Not trying to look over 25 years younger.

If you're exhausted now, imagine trying to pretend you're 21 for the next three decades!!!!

I don't do any of the trying to look young. I work, have a partner, lots of holidays and hobbies. People love me for who I am, not what I look like. I try to be kind, helpful, generous. I wear what I want. I do things that I enjoy. I've had friends and family who have sadly passed away young, this puts your own life into perspective !