How to overcome disbelief in myself?

[mindmap3]

I have a very severe trauma background that is severely limiting my ability to engage in life. It's got to the point where I am terrified of sticking my neck out to try something different & I'm fast becoming a recluse. I can't get past the feeling I'm going to be boiled alive & grossly publicly shamed. I've been having the very best trauma therapy this country can offer for the last 5yrs. Sadly, due to the scale of my experiences progress is painfully slow. Does anyone have any words of wisdom that might inspire me to keep trying?

I can only give you a quote..........

The man who removes mountains begins by carrying away small stones - Chinese proverb

That’s a fab proverb noego and so true.
When things feel insurmountable, we have to start with small steps.

mindmap, Is there something small you’d like to do/achieve?

not entirely applicable, but how about this from Captain Awkward?

"So, this is big. When you feel lonely and needy and isolated, and you make the effort to go somewhere, and you don’t really find anyone you connect with, it’s very easy to weave it into the story of loneliness and failure that you’re experience, a.k.a. Well I TRIED and it DIDN’T WORK and now there’s PROOF.

You have to actively fight against that mentality. It’s not fair. It’s exhausting. But every time you go to a thing and/or talk to a new person, make sure you congratulate and reward yourself for your efforts. Write it down in a journal somewhere. Give yourself a gold star. Tell yourself a different story, one that goes like this: You are doing good things to take care of yourself! You are learning the skill of meeting new people and building a social life as an adult, and that is something that a lot of people need if the volume of questions I get here is any indication. You are learning to find people you connect with; one part of that is figuring out where you don’t belong. Tell yourself that you put on clean clothes and showered and you tried. You saw a terrible band at the local anarchist collective and ate the worst food of your life at the vegan potluck and you listened to crabby Old Farmer Olsen talk about his hip pains for the 1700th time, and even if he didn’t really appreciate it, his wife had a good time not having to deal with him and getting to talk to some new people for a change. You helped give food to people who really need it. You marked trails for hikers who will appreciate not being lost. You petted kittens and puppies who need homes. You learned a new expansion pack of a board game. You gave your parents some alone time without having their roommate underfoot. You are doing the best you can. You are learning new skills. You are finding new interests and strengths. You are doing your best to take your place among your fellow humans. That’s all you can control, and the rest is up to luck."

I’m currently in the same sorta situation.

I find it impossible dealing with change and I refuse to ‘take a leap’ if it’s unfamiliar I can’t do it.

I believe we’re both very capable people and something is holding us back. I often try to analyse why I’m like this and I never seem to find answers. I keep telling myself that one day I’ll wake up and something will just ‘click’ never does.

I just want you to know that you aren’t alone. And I’d love to chat and see what you will advise for me.

I will however say that getting a dog was the best thing to happen to me

If you think you can, or if you think you can't, you'll be right.

I find it impossible dealing with change and I refuse to ‘take a leap’ if it’s unfamiliar I can’t do it

I believe we’re both very capable people and something is holding us back. I often try to analyse why I’m like this and I never seem to find answers. I keep telling myself that one day I’ll wake up and something will just ‘click’ never does

Let go of everything that is holding you back and then there is no need to take a leap. It just happens. There are a million questions but only one answer. Do not believe in the thoughts that hold you back. Thoughts are not real. The belief in those thoughts is creating your reality and it is not a true reality. You are awake, the thoughts are stopping you from seeing that. Do not believe them. If the thoughts can be seen make the choice to disbelief them. Drop all of them.

What is left????

noego

Thanks for picking up on my remark and I really appreciate your reply. I love that idea. It’s very poetic but it just doesn’t transfer.

If it was as easy as that, I wouldn’t like this.

What are you trying to achieve? What's your goal?

@Youmatter

I've been where you are. Believe me when I say the water is lovely, come on in :)