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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Original poster

If you had given up, when and and where did you end up meeting your husband/wife?

24 replies

Christmas2474 · 13/12/2018 14:40

Happy stories welcome.

I’m single again and thought I’d be happily married by now. Christmas isn’t helping!

OP posts:

Notacluethisxmas · 13/12/2018 14:54

I left my exh at 34. Had totally given up on meeting someone who loved me. The marriage was horrendous and I wished it hadn't have happened.

Went on a night out with my best friend. Met at her house. Her brother was staying with her. I tripped up coming into the house, fell into him. It's been 2 years since then and next week he moves in with me. Never been this happy.

Original poster

Christmas2474 · 13/12/2018 14:56

That’s lovely! Congratulations :)

OP posts:

bluecanoeforyou · 13/12/2018 15:05

The gym! Knew him for 2 years to say hello to, both of us in different relationships. They broke down at various times and we went out for a drink to drown our single sorrows. The rest is history, we've been engaged 6 months.

Mum4Fergus · 13/12/2018 15:48

Online...I was 47, single with DS, he was 44, divorced with 3DCs, met 3 years ago. We got married in July this year.

Mum4Fergus · 13/12/2018 15:50

Sent too soon lol we met in a site that was, well, let's say it wasn't meant with long term relationships in mind. We met for lunch on a Monday and by the Friday we knew we were destined for more

MincePieMum · 13/12/2018 16:23

I was single from 18 - 26 and had tried all the usual OLD, uni clubs and societies etc. I worked with a guy who was very nice but not really for me. He asked me to go out with him and a group of friends and I was not up for it at all. No way.

He badgered me on the phone and when I finally got there, he introduced me to a friend he had been travelling with the previous year. That friend is now my husband, and 15 years later, I could not be happier.

MincePieMum · 13/12/2018 16:25

Say yes to every opportunity - not looking for Mr Right or just a shag. Say yes to things you enjoy, put yourself out there doing things that scare you a little. Push your own boundaries and let go. Be happy and contented in yourself and you will be happy with the life you've lived when you look back on it, regardless of how your love life develops.

LuluBellaBlue · 13/12/2018 20:22

Been single for approx 8 years (late 30’s), given up on internet dating and recently been asked out quite a lot, it’s nicely bizarre!
Only said yes to one of them, met him as he’s my mums lodger we’re only a month in but so far so good! And that’s 4 weeks longer than anyone else!

Original poster

Christmas2474 · 13/12/2018 20:51

These are nice to read, thank you :)

OP posts:

Athena51 · 13/12/2018 23:27

Separated from ex-h at the age of 42 (we'd been together since late teens,1 DS), single for two years which was incredible for my mental health and self -esteem but still difficult as i was rebuilding my life from the ground up.

I met lovely DP on Twitter of all places at 44 and we've been together ever since. He's restored my faith in men.I love the bones of him

Athena51 · 13/12/2018 23:28

Should have said, we've been together for over 6 years now.

toffeeapple123 · 13/12/2018 23:40

Following with interest. I'm ready to give up! Need some motivation to keep the faith.

5amnightpanic · 14/12/2018 05:53

Me too

explodingkitten · 14/12/2018 06:19

I didn't give up exactly but was so fed up with unsuccesful dating twats and cheaters that I promised myself at the time to take a year long break from men starting that January first. I went to a reunion on the 4th (!) of January and within an hour fell in love with my now DH. I was 33 and a half.

Veronicat · 14/12/2018 06:24

Mutal FB friends. He friend requested me, met a few months later at an event we were both invited to and never been apart since.

Fairylea · 14/12/2018 06:32

Plenty of fish

We had both nearly given up with it having met so many weirdos on it but we decided to meet for a coffee and we’re glad we did... been together nearly 10 years now and have one dc together (I was divorced with a 6 year old dd when we met).

Hormonecure · 14/12/2018 06:47

I had tried internet dating - been on a fair few dates but I never clicked. I had replied to one local guy and we arranged a date but on the day I didn't want to go. I had personal stuff going on that was really upsetting me.

I remember crying to a friend on the phone, saying I was going to cancel, it was bound to be disastrous. She, in no uncertain terms, told me to fix up and get out to meet him.

Reluctantly, I did. We had a great, fun night...that was fourteen years and Dc ago...we have our moments but I adore him.

Take every chance you can! You never know

PirateWeasel · 14/12/2018 07:20

I'd been single for ten years, then I moved house and decided to do some volunteering in my spare time. I expected it to be me and a load of over 60s, but ended up meeting the future Mr Weasel there doing the same thing!

5amnightpanic · 14/12/2018 09:55

So nice to read. Anymore please

WingingItStill · 14/12/2018 10:04

Am 39 & split from STBXH in April. Met a great guy in Match.com two weeks ago & am about to head off on our tenth date!!

Early days so who knows but the smile on my face is the biggest it’s been for a very long time!!

Trampire · 14/12/2018 10:06

I was 25. Spent my early 20's in a an unrequited love affair with my (male) best friend. Very toxic.

I came to a different city for a long weekend to stay with friends. They had a spare ticket for their Christmas works do (lots of different companies there that worked together)

I met DH there. He was 30.

Dowser · 14/12/2018 10:15

As soon as the Ink was dry on the divorce papers...I went on pof
Chatted over email for 6 weeks to this guy who had a sense of humour...you need one with me .
Had one nice date with another guy who met someone permanent.
Meanwhile my pen pal had a date with a woman who refused a second date...so we agreed to meet.
That was over 10 years ago and we’ve been married for three.
We were 56 and 55 at the time...and we’ve had a blast.
Both had health issues...so definitely approaching the old codgers club...but living it large when we can.

NerdyBird · 14/12/2018 10:28

Got together with DH when I was 34, nearly 35. I'd met him 18 months prior but as his relationship had just ended I put him to the back of my mind even though I liked him. I met him a couple more times at group things and in Dec 2011 we had our first date.
I'd managed to establish that he was still single, and as it was more than year since his split figured he'd probably be up for dating. Now we're married, have a 4 year old, have a house together and I'm a stepmum.
I met him through my flatmate as she is friends with his sister. They'd been friends for years and we had shared for years so really it's odd that we had never met before. We like to think it was destiny in our cheesier moments!

Dowser · 14/12/2018 11:37

My marriage broke up at the same time my ex’s friend cheated on his partner.
We’ve found a great bond and her new partner of 11 years , she met through a friend of a friend on a night out.

She never wavered from the thought she would meet someone lovely ...and she did.
Oh, she was about 42 and both our exes put us through hell with their lying cheating ways and our new guys are worth a hundred of them.

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