Agggghhhhhhhh!! I cant breathe!!

[katjac]

As mentioned on my previous thread, i am really upset in my current relationship. My OH and i have 5 month old babies. I just dont love this man anymore, and we dont have any closeness in our relationship at all....cant remember the last time he hugged or kissed me.

Anyway, my dad, who is extremely controlling, has decided that he doesnt like my OH, although he has only ever seen him 3 times in these 3 years. He has NO IDEA that i am unhappy, so its not that. He has told me that if i stay with this man then he wants nothing further to do with me or the babies. I have also been having extremly rude and upsetting text messages from him about my OH, telling me not to have him with me when i go to see other family members etc etc. These messages have very upsetting swear words in, that i wouldnt even dare repeat, and i just hate all this at the moment! I dont know where to turn, and just feel like i am drowning whereever i turn.

Hi,

Sorry to hear things not good for you at mo. Obviously don't know your OH but perhaps talking to him about it?! I know its frustrating having to 'tell him' re cuddles and things but unless you talk, he'll never get it. If you know its defo over, perhaps time to make big changes. God, must so scary. As for your father, i use that word 'father' very loosely as he doesn't sound like one in the slightest!

Me, just had baby 11wks ago and the visitors are starting to dry up now. Feel bit like the novetly for them has worn off!! Feels like its starting too for me also.

do you mean you have twins ?

Life with new born twins is all consuming and exhausting - NOT the best tie to rationally decide on a realtionship and its future.

God, the first year of a new baby is really hard on a relationship, I expect twins are even worse.

Your father sounds very unpleasant. Do you want to continue to have contact with him? You don't have to see him or hear from him, if you don't want to.

I'd try to avoid making a decision about your relationship with your OH (do you want cuddles from him?), but consider counselling, couples or individual, tbh ...

your dad seems weird to me, telling you who you can have in your life when your and adult and dont live at home, I would get rid of him and then start working on your relationship, start by sitting your OH down and telling him how you feel will be a start