New partner, ex partner, kids & Xmas... how?

[Fireandfury1]

My bf and my ex-husband know (and tolerate) each other. Ex’s DCs are grown up & with their mother/family. He is alone. We have been together for 7/8 months but known each other for years.

My ex-h also has no extended family. Last year he spent Xmas day with me and kids, left in evening. He proposed he brings DCs to mine on Xmas morning and we do lunch together, before he leaves them with me. We have share residency of the DCs.

My DCs (early teens) do not want my bf there on Xmas Day. They like him but they say it’s a private occasion. But he will be alone! They might be persuaded if I put my foot down...

What would you do?

Why can't he spend it alone? It's not perfect for him but what did he do last year? You aren't obliged to invite him over for Xmas. It's quite soon even without kids. Does he not have any friends?

Maybe take the pressure off him too - invite him round for the evening as others have said?

Your kids need to learn they don't dictate what goes on in your house. Your ex may be their dad but you've been separated for three years yet you've had him round every Xmas Day and spent the day together, like a family that is still together, except for him not staying over. I'm not sure that was a wise move. You aren't a family any more. Time they adjusted to the new dynamic.

I'd say ex brings kids round in the morning, spends time with them, presents etc. Then he leaves. You have lunch and afternoon with your kids. Your boyfriend comes round teatime and evening.

If they don't like it, tough shit. As you say, it's not some new bloke they've not known very long.