I have had some family issues this year and my anxiety is really playing up and I am starting to get riddled with guilt as Christmas approaches as it’s the first Christmas ever that I am not speaking to some family members.
I posted in the summer about a falling out I had with my Aunt as she is a raging alcoholic and my uncle was her enabler, trying to hide it, allowing her to go to work (as a carer) when she was drunk.
She was admitted to a rehab clinic in September and seems to be doing ok, I speak with her if I see her but it’s strained and my uncle refuses to speak with me at all because I said I couldn’t be involved anymore when the alcoholism was at its worse. For my own mental health I had to step away and focus on my husband and kids.
My parents both have illnesses, my dad has Alzheimer’s and my mum is recovering from a stroke so I try to be there for them also.
The thing that’s set me off today is I texted my cousin who I have been very close to, to ask about his plans at Christmas, everyone normally comes to ours for breakfast and if he would be coming as normal. He has texted me back and said no I’m busy as I’m having everyone at mine this year. No invite attached to the message though!
I feel gutted as I know this is him “showing his support” for our aunt and uncle that I have fell out with. When this kicked off he said I was terrible for not supporting them more despite me being heavily involved for over 10 years, taking her to hospital when she had taken to much alcohol and prescription drugs, having to go to her workplace to look after her client as she was in no fit state to do so.
I am so gutted and I am actually questioning myself - have I done the wrong thing - am I a bad person?