Friendship...should I give up?

[Upupandiwent]

One of my close friends, who I've known for 25 years has really gone off the radar over the past year since she net her new boyfriend who she's now moved in with. - something that she always complained about other people doing. Over the last year I've tried to arrange to meet up but she akwats says She's too busy. She even cancelled coming to my 50th birthday party, which i was upset about but didn't say anything. Now I've just asked her if she wants to meet up over Xmas and she's said she's going to another friends house next week and could come aling too if I want to. I feel as though I've been asked as an afterthought. I've said I'll go, but now I really don't think I want to. She's not made any effort to see me. We've not had a fall out. We've given each other lots of support over the past few years. I've not seen her now for almost a year. Every time it's been me trying to arrange to see her and her saying she's too busy. I have a few close friends but this has never happened to me before.
Should i let her go?

I think you need to let her contact you next time. Her life has changed recently, she may feel that the friendship has run its course and that other friendships are her priority now (when she has time to spare from her new relationship). She may have been absorbed socially into her boyfriend's family or friendship group.

It sucks but you can't do much.

I wouldn't give up on her. Don't be too proud? Just go along and see if you guys still have that connection? Maybe tell her you've missed her and see what her response is?

Do it go. Ffs she is taking the puss and you will have a shit time wary you were an afterthought. They nc and wait to see if she gets in touch. She is doing the thing She hates and either you call her out on it or just live with it. It shit of course it is but I'm sorry the 50th is a deal breaker for me. And why was her partner able to persuade her after 1 year to not go vs 25 years together as friends. Sorry but these ones saying go along are bullshit. It's bullshit. Your her best friend and she token invites you to some other persons house.... your better than this and you know it.

Yes, I'm now thinking I dont want to go to our mutual friend's house, (who incidentally, hasn't been in touch to ask me to go). I hope I'm not sounding precious, but I just feel as though if she never saw me it would be ok with her.

She knows what she is doing - and she is choosing to do it for whatever reason. You cant control this and I would not waste your headspace trying to figure out why. Don't ask she won't say why and it will not change the outcome anyway.

Just let it go graciously - don't chase - be dignified. Focus on filling your time with other people.

Friends are for a reason, a season or a lifetime. Looks like she has moved the goal posts.

Thank you everyone for giving me some perspective. I think i need to leave her to her new life. I'll make my excuses for not going to our friend's house. I think she'll see that as me not making an effort though.

Don't worry about what she thinks. She isn't making any effort. Your friendship has run it's course. It can be tough but from my experience cutting some ex friends out can be very liberating.

Move on and enjoy your life.

I wouldn't go, especially as hosting friends hasn't invited you, and you already feel like an afterthought.

It sucks, and I feel for you. Same has happened to me several times. I always felt I was doing the contacting. When I stopped, I never heard anything. It hurts.

Good luck. Enjoy life.