How do you know if you love someone but your not 'in love' with them?

[cantbeatfreshsheets]

I'm wondering how you know if you're with someone and think you love them but you're not actually in love with them. If you know what I mean?

Does anyone have any similar experiences or feelings and if so how do you know whether you are in love or not?

I know it's a totally random post.

Thanks in advance

I loved my ex husband, but wasn't in love with him. I felt like he was my best friend, I cared for him very much, I guess in the way you do your family for example. I wanted the best for him, enjoyed spending time with him, was upset if we argued, thought about him before myself in a lot of things.

The difference between the two is that when you are in love, you have all of those same things, but you feel like they are part of you, there is a more intense connection and desire.

Breaking up with someone you love is hard, but someone who you are 'in love' with is souls destroying. The pain feels physical as well as mental and emotional. That's my opinion, because for me, I can clearly separate the two.

Both light and shadow
are the dance of Love.

Love has no cause;
it is the astrolabe of God’s secrets.

Lover and Loving are inseparable
and timeless.

Although I may try to describe Love
when I experience it I am speechless.

Although I may try to write about Love
I am rendered helpless;

my pen breaks and the paper slips away
at the ineffable place
where Lover, Loving and Loved are one.

Every moment is made glorious
by the light of Love.

Rumi

expatinspain I think you have hit the nail on the head. It's the two words you mentioned that resonate. Connection and desire. Both of which are lacking. Many thanks :) sometimes just getting others opinions can give the clarity we sometimes need.