I’ve done it again

[Noseyrosey991]

I’ve found another ‘emotionally unavailable’ bloke and fallen for him.... what the fuck is wrong with me? I thought I had a ‘type’. Went for something slightly different this time only for him to be another fuckwhit that I cannot get enough of....

Long and short of it it is, I’m in my early 30’s and shit scared I’ll never find ‘the one’ in time to have children.... I’m evidently shite at picking men.

Please, someone kick me up the arse....

Well...what is it that attracts you? What do they possess that catches your attention? You say you went for a ‘slightly’ different type so you must have a type.

Also I’m not quite sure what emotionally unavailable means? I’m not being flippant...genuinely curious?

Well for the first time I went for a slightly older guy, builder.....bit rough around the edges.

Previous have been slightly younger, well-groomed (perhaps even vein)..... pretty.... athletic. All unfortunately turned out to be liars / cheats.

I tend to meet these guys OLD where you only have image / bio to go by. In the past, I have been attracted to guys that are the opposite of all of the above and I’ve fallen for their personality but opportunities to meet new and genuine guys are few and far between.

By emotionally unavailable I mean enjoy the beginning bit of getting to know someone then constantly having excuses as to why moving to the next step would be difficult, right now. It’s not about sex, I’ve been seeing him nearly 4 months and haven’t slept with him.

If you haven't slept with him after four months, it may well be about the sex (or lack of it). I'm not saying your choice not to have sex is wrong, but it may be a factor.

It’s not my choice either.....

I tell him to stop dithering about what he wants. Tell him to get lost (reluctantly because I do really like him). Only for him to return..... and for it to start again

I sympathise. I always seem to pick the wrong type of woman, over and over again. I’ve recently ended a long term relationship which wasn’t right from day one if I’m being honest. I’ve decided to give it a break now. Maybe a couple of years down the line I might revisit the dating scene.

At any rate meeting someone who is right for you is tricky. Especially if we are knowingly or unknowingly choosing people with certain traits that make us more prone for bad relationships. It’s difficult.

I’d be a bit of a hypocrite to tell you to keep on trying when I’ve had such terrible fortune. But there’s a lot of posters here who have been successful and got the life they wanted. And as one poster once said to me, we all deserve a little happiness. You do too.

You’ll find good and bad men in all walks of life. Don’t give up. Keep trying. You never know who you’ll meet. Bit scant on practical advice but wanted to offer a bit of sympathy.

Thank you maximum you too