How to save a relationship?

[ernjas]

Not sure where to start with this one as I'm not really sure what answers I'm looking for.

DP and I have a 2 year old together. We were separate for a while but got back together when he was about 14 months old.
We get on great some times and other times we keep clashing, but more frequently at the minute we just come back to the fact that we aren't happy. This is usually triggered by something small happening.
It just feels like a massive build up of small things between us and just when I feel like we are starting to be happy without arguing, clashing over little things etc, we end up right back at the start again, criticising each other and telling each other we aren't happy.

Does this sound salvageable or are we just going round in circles? I feel like neither of us even have a clue exactly what the problems are now it just feels like there is problems, if that makes sense. Does anyone have any tips on communicating this to each other in any way?

Do you still love him?

Just a suggestion, but you could try both reading 'Men are from Mars, women are from Venus'. It's not necessarily completely right, but it might make you more aware of which form of communication works best for you. Some useful tips. Once you start communicating on each others levels, you might make a breakthrough. You just need to be completely honest with each other, without tearing each other down.

It depends what it is about eachother that's rubbing you both up the wrong way and also why you're together. I stayed with my DCs dad far too long because of her, eventhough we just weren't compatible in any way. Different priorities, different sense of humour, different ideas on peoples roles in relationships etc, these things can't be over come without making you miserable

Why did you separate originally; for the same reasons as you are writing about now?. What are the bones of contention here in this relationship?.

Why are you together now?. If it is really for the child then I would say do not stay for the sake of the child.