Thongs or Bridget Jones pants for a 43 year old divorcee?

[Abitsadbuthopeful]

Does divorce change your fashion sense?
I feel like instead of jumpers and jeans I need to get used to high heels and short skirts. What's everyone else done post divorce, in other words is this normal???

Did you lose your brain along with your marriage? If you don't fancy dressing up as a drag queen, dont do it!

You do know that fashion and style exists in the bizarre middle ground between "jeans and jumper" and "high heels & miniskirt"?

I think it does yes.
You feel like you need to make more of an effort.
I'm older than 43 and still wear thongs but some occasions call for Bridget Jones pants!
I changed my hair entirely when I split with ExH.

Don't do it.

Be yourself.

Is that a serious question ?

I didn't find that thongs became any less uncomfortable once I separated but maybe they will once I'm divorced...I do hope so!
Seriously...be yourself and wear what you feel comfortable in because if you're not comfortable it will show.

BTW i am separated (not actually divorced yet cos i am lazy), buy a LOT of underwear, and wouldn't be seen dead in either thongs or Bridget pants. Find your own style, that suits you, and if you want, find a man who suits you. I will say, its liberating to be able to try out different styles and not have someone snark at you about why you're getting done up like a dog's dinner, or who you're wearing the nice underwear for, or what do you think you look like...

Yes, maybe that's it, I feel quite liberated and the change is so massive. I can please myself at long last and not incur the wrath of the fashion police (stbxh) x

And yes I do feel I lost my mind a little bit over this, but more importantly I lost a bit of my self and the future I thought would be mine, so I'm looking for new directions.....xx

Dress how you want to, don't be led by what you think you should wear. I'm 43 too and the bridget jones pants will def be coming out during the party season, but the sexy frillies too at times. Wear the highest heels you can walk well in. Hold your head high, smile and have fun. Its your time to shine now. Go get em x

I'm fairly recently divorced after 30 years and my renewed interest in fashion is one of the most delightful and unexpected blessings of being free. Never tried thongs before, find I like them, wear them when I want to. Ditto dresses and heels. Not all the time obvs, but it's fun. And makeup too. For me it's part of breaking out of that cocoon of unhappiness that went around camouflaged in leggings and fleeces, hoping my life would start again with divorce. And it has.

Bin the jumpers and embrace the thongs.

Do whatever you want - you don't have to answer to anyone!

Do whatever you want. I can't stand the feel of thongs or g strings anymore. Makeup feels funny on my skin.

I used to wear all that and heels etc. all the time. I would live in my dressing gown if I could get away with it!

I don't see the point of thongs which I find uncomfortable and useless., I'd rather go commando which I sometimes do with leggings or tight skirts to avoid VPL. Love my sloggis most of the time but most are black so I can pretend they are racier than they are.

Somewhere in between, maybe?

Why didn't you just say at the start that it was your ex who used to "police" your clothing choices and now you feel you can wear what you like?

Otherwise it's very odd to start a post about divorce = high heels + mini skirt.

Wear what you like! Not difficult

If you've felt quite controlled about your clothing choices by your ex then now is the time to experiment and find out what you feel best when wearing.

You don't have to just pick "glam", "frumpy" or "sensible" - you can wear different things on different occasions! When I'm not at work and it's just me and my son at home I will wear jeans and t-shirt or jumper, with trainers if we're going out, because we are usually doing DIY or something else practical and physical to take care of our animals. If I'm meeting up with a friend for dinner or drinks then I'll either wear jeans and a smart top with mid heels, or a casual dress with mid heels. If I was going on a date I'd probably wear the same. (I can't wear high heels for a variety of boring reasons.)

I wouldn't ever wear a mini skirt as I don't find them comfortable or flattering - but if you feel confident in them then you go for it!

Regarding underwear - it's remarkable how much more confident I feel if I'm wearing nice matching underwear. Doesn't have to be anything "sexy" - there are lots of pretty matching sets in Asda, Tesco, M&S, Primark, Matalan, plus more expensive options in Agent Provocateur, Bravissimo and Boux Avenue. Even though nobody can see them, it gives me a lift when I put them on and look in the mirror!

(Tip: buy one bra and 3-4 pairs of the matching knickers, then you can still wear matching sets all week whilst the first 2 pairs of knickers are in the wash )

Thanks gang, I suppose the underwear is a cry to feel wanted again. How weird as I don't feel the need to jump into a new relationship and I truly do value myself. I suppose I'm just scared.