I need out

[Justme1992]

Ive been with my partner for years, we have 4 beautiful children together. We've split up a few times. The last time, he got a woman pregnant and I've done nothing but support him. We have his daughter here all the time.
The problem is, he's lazy, he smokes weed (not around the house) he spends all of his money on himself and when i confront him about it, he calls me a fat, ugly, a dirty slag, used up and tells me to go and die. He keeps saying he's got better offers but he wont leave me alone. Last time we split up, i met someone. He was threatening to kill himself if i didn't give him another chance. Bottom line is, I'm drained and i need out of this horrible relationship. I need a fresh start with just me and my children. My wages are nowhere enough for a deposit on a move. Christmas around the corner too. Where do i start?

Sorry OP, what a horrible man he is and you need to get out of this ASAP. You do not want your children growing up around this toxic relationship. Do you own or rent?
Whose name is the mortgage/tenancy in?
Have you looked on the benefit calculators online? They will tell you how much you will be entitled to. You have 4 children and work so you should get child and working tax credits. He will also have to pay you maintenance. Does he work?
You might find you're actually better off financially without him. You will most certainly be better off in every other way!

You honestly have to come on here for advice; the man is abusing you, and your children are watching one fucked up relationship, this is their norm and they will grow up to replicate and become the abuser and the abused.

Don't really know what to say other than perhaps you need your own counselling to determine why you think you are worth so little.

Does your username mean you’re only twenty six, with four kids by this guy already?

I know what i need to do but as i said, i don't know where to start. Its been going on that long i guess im just used to it. Don't realize how bad it actually is until you open up to people you dont know. It sounds sad and pathetic and as a mother, i should be stronger. These comments and private messages have been an eye opener. Believe me. Im not moving anywhere at the moment. Kids ate settled in school and they have friends. Im going for an injunction. Dont see why i should uproot my children for him. Thank you all.

Yes get some legal advice because this is good to have ready for when he starts making threats (which he will).
Oh and don't let him use the 'suicide' card. You are not responsible for his actions - HE is. Put yourself and your children first now and get this awful excuse for a man out of your life.

You sound like you have made up your mind, and rightly so. Well done. Stick to your guns and don't get swayed by aggression or suicide threats. My exDW held me in limbo for a year with suicide threats after her affair was exposed, even letting me find the car rigged up with tape and a hosepipe. Eventually I called her bluff and left anyway. 15 years later she is alive and kicking.

Good luck.