Losing weight to met someone new please help

[Beautifulbridie]

Hello
Sorry posting this on here as I feel it is related to relationships. Last six months escaped an abusive relationship and for the very first time in my life looking after myself instead of everybody else. I have one DD who is 5. I am finding myself comfort eating and really want to get help to stop doing this so I have a chance to meet somebody nice on the future. I would be so grateful for any advice.

I'm trying to lose 2 stone - it's really hard as comfort eating is a bad habit of mine!
At the moment I'm calorie counting- I've already lost 2 stone thanks to this.

I try to stick to 1400 calories on a day off & 1500 on a work day.
I make sure everything I eat is low sugar & low saturated fat (below 3g).

I do go to the gym twice a week mainly doing weights but my hip is sore so I haven't been for a week. I'm seeing a physio soon about it.
I also walk everywhere & spend work days in my feet.

I've cut out the foods I binge on eg chocolate, cakes, chips, takeaways, crisps, biscuits, sweets, added sugar, full fat cheese & butter, oils.
I find that if I do eat any of these foods I just want more & more.
I don't have any of these foods in the house.

If I go out for lunch / dinner I watch what I eat & count it as 500 calories, or 700 if I have dessert as well.
It's not accurate but it helps me to stay in control.

If I don't stick to my calories for even a day I find the weight goes on as I'm on a lot of medication which affects my metabolism.

It helps that I'm on a tight food budget now so I can't justify spending extra money on food that isn't nutritious.

Some of my friends prefer Slimming World but I've noticed the weight often goes back on.

The most important thing is to feel happy with yourself when you start dating - if you aren't it will show.

Do you like exercise?

The Body Coach gives away lots of free content in terms of food & exercise.

How much weight do you want to lose?

I just want to say that you can still meet someone lovely at any size, thin or fat, so don’t let the weight issue stop you if you’re ready to meet someone.

No advice here I’m afraid - just wanted to say you’re not alone with the comfort eating - I do it too, and it’s so, so hard to stop. A few months ago I was genuinely horrified to see myself in the mirror and decided things had to change. I know this sounds weird, but I’ve tried to keep up this internal monologue in my head, trying to talk to myself as though I would the DC or someone I cared about. Every time I reached for the biscuits I’d give myself a stern talking to. I’ve gone down two dress sizes in as many months, purely by stopping my comfort snacking in the evenings. A long way still to go though.

And I try to distract myself too - my house has never been so clean!

Try Facebook group. Eat less move more.

I just want to say that you can still meet someone lovely at any size, thin or fat, so don’t let the weight issue stop you if you’re ready to meet someone.

I have no idea why people say this.

When I was last 'dating', I was a size 10/12 hourglass. I'd lost a bit of weight and started exercising too so was feeling pretty confident too.

I was mocked/criticised an awful lot by men. Some were men I had dated some were just men I knew (not friends, obviously): "laying down a bit too much fat"; "could stand to lose a few kilos"; "'big' for a small girl" (I'm 5'3")...

Ergo, I no longer have any interest in dating or men!

My DW has successfully lost 4 stone over the last 12 months through a combination of exercise, intermittent fasting (basically 2 meals a day), reduced alcohol consumption and using a Fitbit / MyFitnessPal (calorie counting everything) amongst other things.

She has found the Reddit community /LoseIt really helpful, and also thinking about Total Daily Energy Expenditure (TDEE) at her target weight (and eating towards that). She's also taken an approach that involves mainly focussing on weekly intake not daily, not beating herself up when it doesn't work for a few days, and giving herself regular breaks (e.g when we go on holiday or celebrate birthdays). She weighs daily and tracks against her periods - water retention has a surprisingly significant cyclical impact. Thinking about it as a long term lifestyle approach rather than a short term diet and being kind to herself has been key, I feel.

She wrote a long post on Reddit/LoseIt about what had worked for her. PM me if this sounds of interest and I will share a link.

Hopefully you can tell, I'm really proud of what she has achieved.