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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

How Can I Be Less Needy In My Friendships and Relationships?

0 replies

SurfScoter · 11/11/2018 16:01

Hi,
I'm in my very early 20's and still studying, and most of my friends are as well.
Growing up, I've always had a great relationship with both of my parents. Their life was centred around my siblings and I, and they have always had lots of time for me (which I know is great and normal).
For some reason, this constant validation is something I feel I need from friends as well. Whenever friends cancel plans, I always tell them it's OK, but I often just feel disappointed and kind of down. I have only thus far had one relatioxcip of sorts, which was toxic in its own way, but I used to worry a lot if I texted him and he didn't get back to me, although part of it was me worrying about him and his mental health issues. I know this sounds really terrible, but I feel that my friends would have more time for me if they had more free time. For example, I like to write short stories and one of my friends keeps saying she'll get to it, but still hasn't. (She probably will eventually).
Is there anything I can do to avoid needing so much validation from people? It's a trait about myself that I am not proud of, and I really want to do something about it.
Thanks.

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