You remind me of me! I didn't miss mine even slightly. He started by guilt tripping me and trying to gaslight me that I was totally unreasonable and had booted him out for no reason - thus reinforcing the behaviour I'd booted him out for.
Sadly he moved on to coming to the house and threatening violence. He was clearly working up to attacking me and I had to move out for a while to make him understand this wouldn't work either. His sense of entitlement was something to behold. With hindsight, if yours does this, I would suggest involving the police immediately because later on during court hearings over contact for our daughter, I was asked: if he was really violent, why didn't you call the police?
Of course, the reason was loyalty and feeling sorry for him. I was wrong to feel that way, he didn't have an ounce of loyalty towards me. Don't wait for yours to prove it to you, just trust your instincts and stick to the course you've set yourself.
Make it clear that if his behaviour doesn't change when you meet, you'll have to stop meeting. I did this when mine turned every visit to collect our daughter into an excuse to argue and start ranting at me about my selfishness. I arranged for an intermediary to be there instead (a very good woman friend).
The same friend helped me put things into perspective when I was telling her he couldn't seem to cope without me, and I was worried he'd become homeless or something. She said 'Why is that your responsibility, any more than another homeless person? You might as well take in someone from the street.' This really stuck with me because it's true, anybody in trouble has a right to compassion but I was being guilt tripped into feeling that my ex was my personal responsibility and what happened to him was my fault. Rather than his, as an adult human being.
Honestly, you're not doing anything wrong. If you weaken and are too kind to him, he'll think you're going to take him back. I found a strictly neutral tone to be the best, and don't get drawn into arguments because that's another way of continuing the relationship. I had to just keep explaining that things were really over, and when that didn't work, withdraw and avoid contact.
If you have children, that's more difficult to do. Mine continued the argument through my daughter.
Good luck, you deserve your own life and a day will come when you are free of all this and of him. You'll be able to live your life and think no more about him, as I have done x.