FB messenger scam or lying h?

[Whiskaspie]

Our FB are on the same devices and we have many of the same friends, there has never been a problem about seeing each other's stuff.
For context, h works away a lot, and has cheated in the past twice that I know of, although I only recently found out, it was a very long time ago and I thought things were good in between (house, marriage, kids) so are trying to work through it.

A few weeks ago, he got a FB messenger from a Cathern Galvan. Noticed it a few days ago. No pic. Recently created messenger account, but doesn't have FB account. Apparently, his phone number was used to find him. He's had his current number for three years. Her message was 'hello bob' (obviously Bob isn't his real name).

He apparently doesn't know her. Convo was deleted. Nothing else so far. There were no baity clicks links as described in recent known messenger scams.

So, was it a scam, or a woman he doesn't want to admit to knowing? How would she have his phone number unless he'd given it out? Anyone had/ know of similar? The woman's name I gave was the real one used, in case anyone knows her and wants to get in touch :). Or has had the same random account contact them/ their dh.

Interesting. So either he definitely has seen and accepted it (which he denies), or it's someone he's had contact with before. It's looking dodgy.

Op, you can connect on messenger now without being friends on facebook.

Interesting. So either he definitely has seen and accepted it (which he denies), or it's someone he's had contact with before. It's looking dodgy. Correct!

I get a lot of those widowed soldier messages (must look desperate). They typically go into my 'others' folder where I have to accept the message but there are a few that sneak through unfiltered. I wouldn't say it's a definitive sign of cheating if there is nothing else suspicious going on.

I get... about one stranger a week? On average messaging me that I’m not friends with (not dodgy, work related, lol) I’ve never had a single one that’s not had to be accepted before it’s in my normal messages.

Further messages from them go straight in, even with a long gap between them... but I’ve never had any that go straight there without me accepting them.

If he hasn't got his settings right then someone could search for him via his mobile. I have the box ticked on my FB and Messenger settings so people can't look me up by my phone number

What does he say?

I've also had messages from people who are not Facebook friends, and I've always had to accept them before they show up in my messenger inbox

Of course he says he has no idea who it is, and why would they be using a pseudonym? (erm, because whoever it is has proven dodgy in the past?)

So, only one person so far has had a message from a new person which went straight to normal messages rather than having to be accepted? No doubt he would now say that proves he doesn't know her, as it does happen!

“No doubt he would now say that proves he doesn't know her, as it does happen!”

Does it? None of the devices I use to access messenger even have an other folder anymore...

It’s messages on the home page, then requests in people and filtered ones underneath that... requests are messages from people you’re not friends with on Facebook and haven’t accepted yet and filtered are the ones they weren’t even going to bother showing you because they think they’re spam.

He's lying. Your gut must be telling you that or else you wouldn't be on here.

tabula apparently, for one person...

So another few q which may be relevant, if anyone knows the answer:

1. If you made a new messenger account under a different name than the person you contacted as before, would it still go through to messages? (assuming you're using the same phone number for your new account?)
2. If you had a new account under a different name, would it still go through (even if only to the requests stage) if you had been blocked under your original account?

“apparently, for one person.”

Except she mentioned the other folder, which is why I was saying I don’t know that there is one anymore.

Re your questions, different account is counted as a different person, so you don’t have any more access to anyone than if you were actually a different person.

As in, my DD uses my phone, switches accounts to hers and she can’t message my friends without it being a request that needs to be accepted and I can’t message hers without it being one either.

With the different account thing, I was wondering if you could set up a different messenger account with a different name but using the same phone number (maybe you'd have to temporarily suspend your original account to be able to use the same phone number?) and thus be able to go straight through to the messenger folder. As it would recognise the phone number? Don't know if that's possible.

If it helps I think this can happen. I have had random mesages from people I don't know saying hi. They've never used my name. There are so many scams on facebook messenger.

@tabulahrasa I just call it my other folder as that's what it used to be called. On my phone there is a section called people and at the top there it shows new requests. Much simpler to just refer to it as my other folder