Shy with women

[Nessabban]

Hi,i have come to the conclusion that I am shy with women.I have an issue in the sense of signals,when it is right or wrong when to talk ?.

I know this sounds stupid,but when I talk to male friends it is easier but with women the sexual angle crops up.I don't have any female relatives or friends basically.I did have some relationships in my 30's but since my last girlfriend left in 2010,I haven't had anything.This was a one night stand.

I am an only child and prefer my only company.I am 50 next year,so want to settle down if possible.I was bullied in school so don't really trust people.

I have problems with weight leaving school being heavily overweight then lost it.In my late 20's put it back on again then lost it again then crept back up and lost it again last year.

On top of this I had testicular cancer when I was 30 and had erectinal issues since this so even if I get a girlfriend I hope they are sympathetic.If I do go out it is usually on my own it is at the weekends as I work until 2am during the week.

Since I live in a large town,most people think I am gay anyway even though I ain't but it destroys my confidence to talk to women

Any help is much appreciated thanks😃

Firstly stop thinking woman are weird aliens. We're people, just like your male friends. Treat us like people and not sexual angles and we will respond.

Stop looking at us all as potential girlfriends but potential friends. Until you can treat us like people we will sense your 'sexual angle' and not want to talk.

Ask us about ourselves, our lives, interests and options. Get to know us. Don't come out with a list of questions judging our suitability as girlfriend.

Decide to make female friends. Not nervously hunt us as potential bedmates. We can sense that a mile off!

If someone is open to conversation they will smile and respond with their own questions. If they answer with short yes no answers then they don't want to talk so smile and leave them alone.

And why is a 'sexual angle' anyway?

Typo 'what is a 'sexual angle'?

Do you have any interests outside of work? Do you have contact with women at work as part of your working life? There must be some interactions with women that are quite straightforward in your life.

Maybe you would lose the 'sexual angle' if you tried treating women like actual human equals and not another species.

If its just sex then get a prostitute, much less hassle than a relationship, then concentrate of gaining friendships both male and female join a gym or workout class. Who knows you might meet someone.