WWYD - Hen Abroad & Pregnant

[pancakes22]

I am (currently) bridesmaid for a friend and arranging her hen do for July. As we couldn't manage to get everyone abroad for her hen, a separate group of her friends who I don't know have arranged for her to also go away with them in March.

What she doesn't know is that I have just found out I am pregnant and due the weekend before the hen do in July so will not be able to go. The other group have friend have messaged me and the rest of bridesmaids to see if I want to go away with them in March to Tenerife. None of the other bridesmaid have said they will go because they are paying to do the UK based on in July.

Do I say yes and go away in March when I will be around 5/6 months pregnant to make an effort for my friend. Or, would you not go because you don't know anyone and can't drink or go on the activities because you are pregnant?!

WWYD?

Honestly, on principle I wouldn’t do a second hen do that no one else wanted to go on. I would let her have her actual hen do and maybe offer to plan a special night out just the two of you before you’re due.

I don't think I'd bother. A whole weekend of drunk people while sober is not my idea of fun! And you've no idea how you'll be feeling physically by then.

What's the July hen? Is it a weekend away? Can you not go at all?

For now, I'd just make something up to tell the Tenerife hens about why you're grateful for the invitation, but you can't make it.

Congratulations though!

@mindutopia thank you yes that's an idea maybe il just take her somewhere else to make up for it like a show or something.

@whatbeshrekking July is going to be either night in Amsterdam or night in london. Either way I will be due that weekend so will not be moving anywhere other than from my sofa or to the hospital!! Haha!

Thank you for your advice. I just feel so guilty

Don’t feel guilty. I’m sure your friend will understand and be thrilled for you. I wouldn’t go to either in these circumstances. Couldn’t you have a nice spa weekend with your friend or something similar?

Why do you feel guilty? You didn’t get pregnant to spite her! Don’t go to either, IMO.

I wouldn’t go to Tenerife when 6 months pregnant with a bunch of people I didn’t know!