How do you move on

[Alonealone]

So long story short.
Married for 8 years when husband walks out.
12 weeks later meets someone else they are together for 6 months before I find out and he decides he loves me and wants to come back.
Cue a year of him going backwards and forwards between the two of us. (Without my knowledge that the other women was still in the picture.
Eventually I find out that even during marriage counselling where he played the role of the hard done by husband he is still sleeping with this woman.
Like an idiot I still take him back for the sake of our child only for him to wake up the morning after we had sex, the day after dcs 7th birthday and tell me he doesn't love me, packs his bag and goes.
Our child is devastated and I'm wondering how I'm going to manage on my own with no friends , family or support and rolling down the wrong side of 40. Without him Im clmpletely alone. How do people do it. How do you do christmas alone with dc? I hate where Iive, I hate my job . My ex was the reason I stayed but now I can't move as it would mean dc won't see him.
I just don't know how to go it alone but I so desperately want to just put this behind me and move on.

Hi have spent the whole day doing just that. Sending you a virtual hug. Maybe instead of the whole writing list thing we could pick one thing we will do tomorrow that will move us forward. Mine is filing the divorce.

I think my ex has now blocked me on everything which I guess is fair enough. I won't hear from him again now unless it's via email because continuing to text is obviously pointless.

Alone - good idea to take steps forward
Stew - hard as that sounds NC may be better to help speed through the stages

I was chatting to a few other users I got talking to on here who are going through this and it really helps.

I think some of us are worried about over burdening friends and family but others that have gone through the same or going through it at the same time understand all the emotions.

Anyway, a few posters said about making a support group, would anyone be up for a whatsapp group? Share messages of support etc? If interested pm me and I'll set one up.

I'm going through this too, I feel like I can actually feel my heart breaking.
Managed to get my children to school and that's about it, I'm a mess.

themiddleismyhome sending a vitual hug.
I THINK the fact that you got them there is enough. I struggled with that this morning as well and them just thought f this it's too much so went to gp burst into tears was reffered to counselling and signed off work for a week. She offered me anti depresents but it's a road I just don't want to take.
I suspect I'm just run down as I can barely stay awake all I want to do is sleep but then I the night I'm up every couple of hours.

How are other people doing?

Today is the first day.I haven't rang anyone in real life including him to go on about it.
I feel like that is my achievement and I'm hoping I can stay off the phone u till tomorrow.

Anyone up for this WhatsApp group
I can’t talk about it on here!

Every day is some new drama

I would do a yahoo one or a pm group if that's possible.
I'm finding posting on here therapeutic if I'm honest. Quite simply because I feel I'm not burdening people who know me.

Hi, I am also going through a hellish breakup with my husband. He only left this week and the pain he is putting me through is consuming me. I hate myself for becoming someone that isn't me. I am consumed with anger and just want to hurt him but I know that's not the answer. I just want this stage to be over:(

I've cried all day again. I often get told I'm quite hard faced but I am really struggling to get it together. I don't have much real life support could really use some friends

@porkarooney at least you see it as a stage that means there is an end to it.
@themiddleismyhome you and me both.

My achievement for the day is that I walked 20,000 steps. ( then I got home made a cup of tea and cried -neighbours probably thought someone was being murdered- tea was cold by the time I'd finished).

With the exception of dc I haven't spoken to anyone. At first I desperately wanted to not be alone with this but now I think I need to be alone to try and deal to accept that this is me now.
Tomorrow I plan to tackle the complete shit tip my house has become due to spending time wallowing and sleeping.
Anyone have any small steps they plan to take?

I'm going to reach out tell a couple of friends what is going on and try to make a few plans so I have something to look forward to.
I've only cried once this morning but feel very anxious.
How's everyone else feeling?

@themiddleismyhome exhausted but not teary which is a plus.
Good that you can speak to friends about it and make plans.