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Relationships

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I think I might accidentally end up two timing

28 replies

squarehead · 17/06/2007 22:04

This might sound a bit weird, and so far it has not yet turned into a great big problem (and hopefully it won't), but it is a potential problem that I'm hoping to get some thoughts on.
I am on an internet dating site. I'm kind of half-heartedly looking. Anyway, I recently read the profiles of two different men, and I sent a message to them both. Nothing much, just suggesting friendly conversation between us. To be honest, I was not expecting any enthusiasm (being as I told on my own profile that I have children, and to a lot of men that is a put off). However, both of them have showed an interest, and both want to see a picture of me and to chat...
So, what do I do? Is it bad dating site etiquette to get to know two men at the same time? Obviously, it is only on a friendship level anyway to begin with, but we all know that it is with a view to more happening if we end up hitting it off.
Should I just pick one, and phase out the other? Should I 'two-time them' anyway, and just hope that I don't fancy them both, and attract them both?
Should I tell them about each other?
Is it a big deal?
I know it sounds ridiculous because in all probability it will not go beyond a few e-mails in either case, but I am just dreading a situation where I get sucked into a web of deceit, and lead one of them on.
Please tell me what to do?
Anyone with experience?

OP posts:
essbeehindyou · 17/06/2007 23:04

Message withdrawn

squarehead · 18/06/2007 07:52

Thanks for all the feedback. So, the general consensus is that it is not two-timing unless it goes further than just chatting and meeting up. Does that also apply when we are not local, so in order to meet up it would involve a longish journey.
So, should I casually drop into conversation the fact that I'm chatting to others? Or not mention it unless it comes up?
I suppose it feels a big deal because I know other people who have declined to chat to anyone else (on dating sites) because they are already getting to know someone.
I don't think it is something I would have done, but it just seems to have happened by accident (in that I messaged two not expecting them both to respond).

OP posts:
NotQuiteCockney · 18/06/2007 07:59

Hmmm, well we can tell you what we think the (unwritten, understood) rules are. But of course whenever you find yourself feeling uncomfortable with the situation, you need to change it.

I wouldn't bother mentioning that you're chatting to other people, I do think that's understood in these environments.

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