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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

so down, first he lied, made me child, lied even more now decided he wants out

2 replies

SaltedRock · 27/10/2018 21:38

Some guys hah,....
I've met him 6 months after my divorce which was terrible and messy. I was still depressed. So when I've met him he was like my rock, hope for new life new familly, new love. We should be happily ever after. We are both from abroad ( but from different countries) I've never met his relatives, he never met mine (I actually had no familly at all). We never really lived together as I lived with my roomates and he with his in other part of Egland. He was working thru computer. My work was near my place that's why all of the time together we stayed in my room/ in my place. He was divorced as well with messy divorce.
One day he asked if we can build familly together, real good familly I was scared of marriage (after this what I've went thru with my ex) so we decided build familly without papers. When I got pregnant he was happy, then had to go to is country get some savings for our future and then he become sick and is "sick" for last 4 years. Meanwhile I've found out some woman on fb put their old pic together ( after I questioned him he admitt it is his wife and they are separated but no prove for that) During 4 years he never gave our child his name , never helped in raising him. He came to Uk 2 times for few weeks and briefly saw his son, thats it, never stayed with us (God only knows where e stayed). We had thousands arguments cause of broken trust and many lies he told me. I was even homeless with our child and there was no help. Now he used our last argument to say he has had enough and doesnt care anymore, doesnt want future with us etc. For now I am just down ,sad. I,ve turned off my phone, took few days off work. Don't understand why people do this to others. How can they just want familly and then dissapear. I am not young anymore he wasn't young either I thought that people in certaing age are kid of responsible. I know I will finish my life alone, as I won't be able to trust anyone anymore. One part of me still hopes he will finaly decide to be with us but that's just hope. Its so hard to be alone with child without no one. To mange work, childcare, doctors alone. And there is no hope it will become better. I just had to tell it someone as I have no one to talk about it.

OP posts:
Dowdydoes · 27/10/2018 21:42

So hard to be so let down. You have done the hardest parts of this though, your child will grow and you will be a team. You can build a life with good people and groups - easier to find sometimes with an older child. This man doesn’t deserve either of you

Seaweed42 · 28/10/2018 08:20

Sorry someone has done this to you. I hope things get better for you. You sound like a great mum who is doing their best for their child. Your ex sounds like a horrible person. Not everyone is like that.

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