I just don't want to invest any time at the outset if he is not interested....been there, done that....
Fair enough, but that's YOUR responsibility, not his. Please don't ask him, "Do you see any potential in us? I mean, like in dating? I'm not looking for you to propose Ha ha lols, but before I spend any more time talking to you I do need to know if you see some kind of possibility here..."
Because you'll sound like a nutjob.
Men only keep in regular contact with people in whom they see some potential. If he asks you out on a date, that's a clear signal he sees potential. If he calls when he says he will = potential.
Just look at what he does. Don't ask for him to start labelling his fledgling interest and packing it into a box, because it'll get scared and fly away.
If you want not to invest too much in disinterested men, do that with your OWN actions. Like:
- Don't text all day - set some personal ground rules there.
- Keep active on dating sites till someone asks you to be exclusive.
- Distract yourself from thinking about men who aren't ringing you (hard, that one).
Promise me you won't initiate a relationship Talk with someone you're not even dating yet?