Hi, I’m just looking for some advice, whether it’s brutal or reassuring, I just need honesty.
I have been with my partner for 7 years and we have a 19 month old together. Life is pretty great, we both have reasonably good jobs, his is very demanding, a lifestyle rather than a job so we live it 24/7.
I work part time and care for our son. We have an amazing support system with our friends and family, I couldn’t really ask for much more but not everything is perfect, as is life.
6 months of the year (because of his job) I feel like I’m a single mum trying to do everything, the housework, dinners, bed time routines, play, organise to meet friends & family in between.
I feel like I’m burning out and not really getting much help from my partner. Now I don’t want to paint a horrible picture of him because he is an amazing dad and provides a lot for us, his family. My worries are him and me. I feel like we are living separate lives even though we live together, I go away for 4 days and we hardly talk. I’m feeling like we are losing us as a couple and I don’t know how to go about it. I’ve mentioned to him that I need more, whether that’s a cuddle while I’m cooking dinner, or doing half the dishes or washing, or making our sons lunch for nursery or a cup of tea made after I’ve put our son to bed so I can sit down and watch an episode of our series together.
Now, the problem is I think I’m the problem. I think I’m overthinking things and making it worse than what it is but I’ve been feeling like this for around 12 months. He’s happier talking to his friends on the phone than when he is with me, he laughs more when he goes to work with his friends than with me. I don’t think he’s happy with me anymore but when I bring it up, he says he is happy with me.
We haven’t been with anyone else but him me and me him so we don’t have anything to compare it too (not that that is always the best thing to do)
I don’t think he is 100% invested in me, in us.
Has anyone been in the same situation and done something to help the other realise or realised that you yourself need to do something differently to stop feeling like this?
Thanks in advance 