How long is 'average' to become an established couple.

[gigigrace]

Eg friends knowing your seeing each other. And more than just 'talking'.

Dating is confusing!

How long was it in your relationships?

A few months probably. I've just looked at a thread where the op was calling someone they'd been dating for six weeks their partner. Too soon.

I've been seeing my boyfriend for 3.5 months. He met my friends yesterday, he is meeting my mum next week. This feels fast to me, but i am quite cautious.

6 months min

I think to call someone a partner, you need a partnership. That takes time and commitment. Six months would be about the lower limit assuming regular dating and monogamy from both partners with an equal understanding of what the relationship meant.

DP and I were ‘hanging out’ for about 5/6 weeks before anyone knew about it (we met through mutual friends) a few more weeks until we ‘the talk’ and he become my actual boyfriend. We moved in together after a year and I suppose I started thinking of him as ‘partner’ about 6 months after that as we became financially joined up quickly. Quicker than I’d advise to others, though it’s worked out well for us.

I don't tend to introduce boyfriends to my friends. I don't see them often and so my time wtih them is precious and I like to keep different parts of my life separate - I don't 'cross pollinate'.

But then, I wouldn't call someone I was dating my boyfriend for around/at least 6 months.

I wouldn't tell my children for around/at least a year and, as they have no need for another man in their lives, I wouldn't feel the need to introduce them to anyone.

Eg friends knowing your seeing each other. And more than just 'talking'.

I would say it's far too soon to be telling friends if your 'relationship' is only at the "more than just talking" stage.

I'm in no way ready just yet to announce anyone as my boyfriend. But last year I was in a relationship for seven months ,and only then did the guy tell me it was just fwb! Don't want my time wasted, but also don't want to rush things and scare people off!

That's a different issue to when you tell your friends though, surely?

Whether you'd told other people or not, the guy you were seeing last year would still have only seen it as a fwb situation.

Although, I'm surprised that you got to 7 months without realising that.

We were within a couple of weeks. We have been together 2 years, engaged for 19 months and living together for 22 months. My previous two Ltr's were longer to establish.

It's quite alarming that you didn't realise it after seven months. Did he lie to you, or you just neglected to ask?

DP and I have been together 11months and recently got engaged. I think it’s a lot to do with age. Teens are in relationships after weeks. Early- mid twenties stay undefined for ages. Mid-late twenties get more ‘where is this going’ and thirties are very ‘ok, we gonna do this or not?’
But then 40+ it sort of reverts back to more casual/ less need to define.

That’s my take on it at least