Can this be saved?

[Hopeful2102]

I’ve recently started talking to my ex after a year of a lot going on in our relationship. Things have become physical before not terribly but to the point where it made me look at him a little differently. He has also cheated on me which led to where we are now, living separately. He has also been physical with me before. Not black eyes but enough to make me not want to let him know where I live for now. I’m not going to lie and pretend I don’t miss him, I do. My pride is screaming no. My head is screaming rake your time be careful. My heart is saying I’m embarassed, I’m upset but I still love you. He says he knows he can be narcissistic, this is what holds us back. I’m trying to think of ways to get him help has anyone ever been successful in this kind of thing?

You have to be successful in keeping him an ex.
Someone who gets physical is only going to escalate.
He is masking. Saying all the nice things to get you back. It will be much harder to leave again...
Stop engaging with him. Ex for a reason.
You are worth more.

It’s ok to miss him but cut him out of your life. Block him in every way and move forward. Not saying it will be easy, but long term it is a million times better for you.
Please also look up the freedom programme and complete it.

Why have you at all started to talk to him again given all that has happened?. You may be lonely and fearful but there is really no reason at all to talk to him. Do now block him on all channels and work on healing your own self rather than trying to save someone who does not want to be either rescued and or saved.

This man will only further mess with your head and body if you let him back into your life. Such men too really do mess with your head and boundaries and yours seem pretty much shot already. Do therefore enrol yourself onto the Freedom Programme run by Womens Aid.

You cannot act ever as a rescuer or saviour in any relationship and it looks like you are still trying to save him somehow. Being either never works in a relationship and when someone tells you who they are it pay dividends to listen. You state he has been violent and is narcissistic; two enormous red flags you need to pay heed of.