Why are they like this

[Feelafool88]

STBXH Chad an affair has never admitted it although confronted with the evidence yet I’m just mad according to him.

He doesn’t give anywhere near as much as he’s meant to for DC in terms of Child maintaince, I’ve let him keep the house and buy me out for a fraction of the price that I am entitled too, he sees DC once a week doesn’t help me out if I need it and still he is horrible to me. Calls me names blocks me from contacting him just makes me feel worthless yet I have been as nice as I can be and trying to make this break up as easy as possible

Why is he like this does it ever get better

Why are you still trying to ingratiate yourself with him.

So far his tactic of denial and aggression has got him the house, reduced maintenance payments and freedom from any chores.

Why would he change tactic? Seems to have worked nicely so far. It’s time to start nailing him down to his responsibilities ...imho

He doesn’t give anywhere near as much as he’s meant to for DC in terms of Child maintaince, I’ve let him keep the house and buy me out for a fraction of the price that I am entitled too, he sees DC once a week doesn’t help me out if I need it and still he is horrible to me

Why have you let him get away with any of this?!

Honestly for my own peace of mind, when we broke up I was the one that had to leave the house he wouldn’t go and I didn’t want the children raised in that environment so I went to my dads. In order for me to get somewhere quick I took the crap financial agreement. He has threatened 50:50 if I go to CSA. And my solicitor told me that I can’t force him to take the children even if I had a court order

He is like that because of how nice you've been you have allowed him to walk all over you and now he thinks he can continue to do so

I can see the reasoning but you need at the very least to claim the full amount in child maintenance. You can’t force him to spend time with his children but you can ensure he pays his fair share.

Of all the people I know who have threatened 50:50, I only know of one who stuck to it.

You really need to see a solicitor. Think of it that every £ you don’t claim is a £ less towards your dcs’ new bike/holiday/university fund. Why should they be disadvantaged because your ex is a git?

Your ex will go on being vile to you for as long as you let him. You have to make a calm, determined stand. It will do wonders for your self respect. .

You need to get what you're entitled to. CSA immediately.
What do you mean 'he has threatened 50:50 if I go to CSA. And my solicitor told me that I can’t force him to take the children even if I had a court order"

Do you mean he has threatened to apply for shared residency if you go to CSA. Sound unlikely if he only sees them once a week.
Your solicitor is correct. You can't force him to have the children.

No, while you let him treat you like shit he will treat you like shit I’m afraid.

Go to CSA.
And stop being so nice.
It's got you nowhere.
Are you the main carer?
DO you work full time?
Does he work full time?
Start keeping a log of how often he sees the DC and how often he communicates with them.
Tell him to knock himself out on the 50:50 custody.
It means you can have a life. Get out and about. Take up a hobby.
Meet new people.
He doesn't want 50:50.
It's a threat.
When he realises it will actually mean you have more freedom he will soon back pedal.
Now get what your DC deserve and stop listening to his bullshit!