Controlling husband? Or am I in the wrong? Feel like I'm aggressive!

[changingnamefornow0]

My husband and I have been together for 10 years. Now he is not completely dominating or controlling, but he does pick a bit which really gets me annoyed. He works all day, but I also work as well so I'm not a SAHM.

I am not an aggressive person but I can snap and bite back. For example, if I've been busy all day with DC, he would then tell me when to cook dinner and then I say if you're hungry, why don't you get up and cook it yourself?

Then he would tell me what to do and how to drive, despite the fact I've been driving for 11 years! I tell him to talk about something more constructive then banging on about something I already know! Then he goes what's wrong with reminding you? I say there's many things wrong inside your head!

He tells me he doesn't like a certain top or trousers I'm wearing, then I say "well you're not the one wearing them are you? So keep your opinions to yourself unless I ask you!"

He tells me how to do things, so I say well if you're happy, do it your fucking self! I feel one day he might end up proper walloping me because as far as I know, when a man is dominating and controlling, the woman doesn't dare talk back!

If you feel like he might be violent to you then you need to get away from him as quickly as possible. He doesn't sound like a good partner anyway, he sounds controlling. Ltb

Why are you together?. Controlling behaviour like he shows you has its roots in abusive behaviour.

Is this really the model of a relationship you want to be showing your children, that yes this is how relationships work?. What are they learning here from the two of you?.

TBH I'd probably give similar responses to you.

Hungry? Sort yourself out.

The driving... DH doesn't do that but I do. His driving on A roads and motorways is frightening for me.

He drives at speed and gets too close to the car in front and it scares me to the point I was in tears recently when he was driving insafely in wet weather conditions.

So I do tell him to slow down, he gets annoyed.

It does seem like constant criticsm though. Perhaps you need to express that to him.

I'd maybe chat with him & tell him you feel like he's always picking at you about things? He might not realise how much he's doing it.

I recently said this to my boyfriend, It was nothing big I was just feeling a bit crappy anyway & I felt he was picking at me about pointless things & it was really winding me up, we talked, he apologised & said he didn't realise & that wasn't his intention, all good since :)