What will life be like now?

[Popsicales]

Hi

I’ve split up with my partner for the final time. We have been together about 5 years and have two very small children. He is has been emotionally abusive and just horrible. He is rubbish with the DC, he just doesn’t know how to handle them. Living with him is like having a third child I really don’t want.

On one hand I’m so happy we are splitting up and I think we will all be much happier but on the other hand I’m scared. I don’t really have any friends, although I’ve just started a new job. I just don’t want to be on my own and have no one to talk to apart from the kids?

Has anyone else been in this position?

Well at least you've got a job so there should be people there to talk to . Just be careful not to go rushing into another relationship too quickly on the rebound. Hopefully you've got family nearby?

I think relationships sometimes consume our energy for friendship and socialising. At the very least give is a sense of complacency. So opportunities to relate to other people are ignored or missed.

You have now have the chance to step out there and reach out to other people. At work and at nursery/school. It will be fine just follow the example of the little ones and go up and talk to somebody. Get involved if you have time with school, in the community and at work

Lots of years ahead of you to make new friends. Lots of you time in the evenings without having to make small talk with somebody you can't stand.

Thank you that’s what I needed to hear. I’m a mixture of excited to start a new era of my life and scared of feeling lonely.

Its new and different, no wonder its scary.

My children were 2 and 3 when my husband left. Please dont make the mistake of getting strait into another relationship esp if your ex was abusive. My ex was and still is abusive towards me, iv found that very very hard to move on from.

Being a single parent, i love. It wasn't what i set out to be but i love it. There are so many positives to lone parenting, you are totally in control. You get to choose exactly how you parent. There is no compromising needed, the very only compromising that needs to be done is when your ex sees the children. You have to learn to let go of control around that, once thats all sorted and your in a pattern, life gets easier.