Family.....arrgghh!

[Monnie]

Anyone feel that they have been taken for granted by other members of the family with children, despite that fact that you have your own?

I have an agreement with Sis to drop off and pick up DN (Nephew) at nursery for two half days a week.

Fine, no probs...until today!

BIL has a day off today - nursery starts at 9.30, but he cannot drop his DS at nursery because 'he will cry'. I understand he will get upset, but may argumant is the more that BIL drops him off, the more he will get used to the idea that he will come back to get him.

Anyway, now Mum and I have to travel across town (me with my DS in tow) to drop off DN then hang around to pick him up.

Meanwhile BIL is off to his mums for a chat.

This is not the first time he's done something like this, ie used us to cover whilst he does something relativley trivial.

I bring the subject up with my mum and she says 'when it's your family, you just do it' and I'm made to feel guilty or that I'm not putting myself out enough.

Any advice would be useful - I don't want to fall out with Sis, but then I don't want to feel that I am a convenient back-up when someone does not want to do something, either

Perhaps you could sit down and have a chat with your sister without your mum around, her attitude does sound scarily Peggy mitchell-like. Does your sister reciprocate the favours, perhaps by baby-sitting? If this isn't a two-way thing then I'd say your family are taking advantage.

Can you underline to your sister that you are pleased to help her but if it is physically possible for her or her DH to take care of their DS then you assume they will do so as you do have a life of your own and activities that you would like the opportunity to do with your DS.