I don’t want sexy time!

[Annie3907]

Me and my partner hardly ever get time to do “the deed” as we both work, have 2 young kids, and sleep most nights by 9.30!

Also, when he’s had a drink he can’t function properly! (Down there ).. we had spoken this morning about doing “the deed” tonight cause it’s been a while (I’m cringing writing this!)

Tonight after tea he starts having a drink, I told him that I don’t like doing it when he’s had a drink because of my reason and now he’s being grumpy! But still drinking!

Should I have been nicer about it or was i right to be honest?

P.s - it works every other time! Just not when he’s drinking, and he’s well aware of that

If he’s drinking knowing it makes having sex unlikely and then got grumpy then I don’t think he’s into the idea.

He’s showing his priorities, drink is more important than sex...

He's allowed to change his mind, but I totally get why you'd feel peeved/let down.

If you have sex so rarely, maybe he is thinking you'd be that bothered?

Not* be that bothered

It definitely is rarely.. but as we had spoken about it this morning and made plans I was expecting it! And excited about it to be honest...

Then he starts drinking... and it’s game over

I think you need to say this to him, that you were looking forward to it.

I know you say you have children, but surely you could both make more effort to have sex? That connection is important.

Do it now before he gets to drunk?

Lol

Have sex in the morning. We could talk about having sex all day but come 9pm neither of us can be bothered!

Does it make him completely disfunctional?

Me and DP do a better job when we've had 1 or 2 these days because life is so stressful but it doesn't affect ability.

What's the point if he can't perform?

^^Agree wholeheartedly with morning. I have good intentions but fall asleep at 9pm.

I told him last night I was gutted and he told me he was only going to have 2 drinks but he ended up finishing the small bottle he had.

I would be up for morning but both kids are up by 6, which means getting up before then and I don’t know if that’s possible!

Yes if he’s drank a fair amount and is drunk then he is completely disfunctional, it’s obvious the alcohol but I can’t help but feel that I can’t “get him going!”