Hi
I’m pregnant with our third child. This wasn’t planned but I’m happy about it however my husband just can’t ‘get used to the idea’. He’s always been a very quiet man - not inclined to share his feelings but it so much worse now. It is making me feel desperately lonely. We only speak about practical things now and even then it’s t
In the fewest possible words. I am the opposite - I am extremely (sometimes too) open about my feelings. I know this makes him feel awkward - particularly when I’m upset (I’m pregnant, hormonal so more upset ham normal).
I am trying so hard to give him his space about this pregnancy. It was a shock to both of us. To begin with I was full of guilt about the way this pregnancy would affect our other children - less money, less space, fewer holidays etc. - but ultimately I am now so happy that we’re having another lo and our children are ecstatic. My husband just cannot get on board with it. He doesn’t want rid (too late now anyway) but he won’t talk about it (other than joke discussions with my two children about silly names for the baby). Even after our 20 week scan - as we were leaving the hospital I asked him how he felt about it and his response was ‘about what’. Then went on to say there was nothing to talk about. We’d done this before etc.
The whole thing just makes me feel so alone. He’s coming to appointments with me but I feel like he’s going through the motions. I’m an older mum and had a few health issues immediately before the pregnancy which mean things are a bit complex. All is likely to be ok but I’m still concerned and would like to talk about t - or even just talk about preparations - but he won’t. It all just makes me feel so so lonely. I’m now having to hide my upset and concerns. I just don’t feel like this is what a marriage should be about. We should be supporting each other. I’ve tried to give him the space he needs and asked for. I’ve told him that maybe sometimes all I need if a hug or for him to ask me how I am but I get nothing.
Maybe I’m being selfish. I just don’t know. He’s not an unkind man in any way but I just don’t feel very loved right now (sorry that sounds pathetic).
Thanks