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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

When you know

2 replies

ItsABeatifulDayNow · 04/10/2018 01:12

Yes it could be good.
It could be great.

But too much shit has happened, too much hurt caused and too much confident knocked to get back to how it was.

The one who caused insecurity is sick of the neediness but holds back enough to maintain the insecurity of the partner.

The insecure partner is sick of being needy but can't give up and so pushes the other away constantly with their pleas for affection, affirmation.

Why the fuck do I do this.

What is wrong with me.

I can't seem to break the cycle and I hate it.

Can't sleep, constant anxiety and I KNOW I could just stop I all.

Help x

OP posts:
Casperandme · 04/10/2018 03:32

Recommend reading about attachment styles op as it sounds like this is what’s happening. This article is a good first step

psychcentral.com/lib/how-to-change-your-attachment-style/

Casperandme · 04/10/2018 03:34

But - be kind to yourself. As you’ll see in the article this stuff is hard wired

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