Confused

[Awwsome]

My husband bought couple of condom packs which were unopened and lube on his work trip abroad.

He emptied the packs into the old box which was bought locally when i queried whereabouts the lube was purchased from. The language on it was Romanian with no English instructions on it so i knew it was not bought from London. He immediately said its bought from savers (a local UK store). I checked with the shop and said they don't said that brand.

On another occasion, without causing any doubt i queried about the condoms too and he said he bought from savers. I confirmed with the headoffice of the drug store and they confirmed they have never sold that brand ever in the store.

Why did he lie? Could he be cheating? Or am i over thinking about it?

Yes, maybe with prostitutes when he's away.

You're not over thinking.

I'm sorry to say I think he is definitely hiding something. This would make me extremely suspicious and I would not trust a word he says as they are clearly from the country he visited and I'm guessing he has no reason to require condoms whilst away from you. for you

Lube could be for masturbating.

There's no rational explanation for condoms apart from "they were much cheaper over there so I got a load to bring back, let's try them out!"

In either case there is zero reason to lie about it.

I would suspect since the new boxes were unopened he met someone he wanted to shag on the trip, went out and bought the stuff, then she stood him up or turned down the offer of sex at their second meeting. Either that or they used an entire full box.

Whichever, those are not the actions of a loyal man.

(I'm not sure when you use the word "pack" whether you mean an individual condom in wrapper, or a box of 3, or 12, or 24, or what)

That phone call to the Savers Head Office must have been... interesting.

Sounds like he’s up to no good, and not arsed enough to bother trying to hide it.

Hello, it's really not ok for you to be doing detective work at this sort of level, there must be some underlying insecurity which you need to address.

So none of them have been used? Your gut must be telling you something OP to make those phone calls...but my spidey senses would be tingling.

The fact you contacted a store and a head office should tell you something?

I don't do liars, so I wouldn't be accepting that

@sethis

There were 2 boxes with 3 in each.

@ stripeszebra

Seriously.... it's not the question of underlying insecurity here. If he is not trying to hide something then why lie about it.

Lets turn the tables around and if tomorrow i am
Away for something and buy stuff like this - come home and lie - wouldn't that make you suspicious.

Of course it's ok for the OP to be detective work at this level... her husband has bought lube and condoms while he was in another country and lied about where he bought them. Since he hasn't been using the items with her, she is perfectly reasonable ascertaining that his purchase story isn't true to figure out where she wants to go from here with him discussion-wise.

He obviously bought them for a reason, and that reason had nothing to do with the OP based on his lying to her.

2x boxes of three from my point of view would support my assumption.

It's not enough to be a bulk buy that's value for money.

It's more than just one that he might take with him routinely.

2x 3 is how many I would buy if I was hoping for, or expecting, 1-2 nights of sex. However I would tend to think that nothing actually happened because buying 3x3 makes no sense when you could just get a box of 9 or 12 for cheaper.

Silly question - do you use condoms together?

Ref the jonnies. Maybe he just enjoys a 'posh wank'?

@category12

Yeah we do

@Sethis

Plus these are not a cheap brand. Its originally from
Germany

Calling the head office of a national company to check up on your partners purchasing habits is not rational
If you trusted him, you would not need to do this.
If you dont trust him, then you have to decide if you want to be in a relationship with a partner who is not trustworthy

I'm with stripeszebra. This is fairly extreme and borderline obsessive 'need to know' behaviour.
Calling head office and going into shops to trace the origin of products in order to 'prove ' to him (and yourself ?) that he is lying , smacks of someone who has been gaslighted and has deep-rooted trust issues.

If those trust issues are as a result of his behaviour, it's time to leave. This relationship is causing you to act in a bizarre way.
If you are someone that checks every action of a partner then the issue is yours. He may not have even registered this as an issue - having bought the items when he was away because they were cheaper than at home - and not even remembered where he bought them.

I've just returned from Hungry where - now I think about it, I bought some disposable razors and moisturiser. If my DH had 'casually' interrogated me about where I bought them - I would probably of said Boots .. If he had then taken it upon himself to go to Boots and 'check up' on my answer .. followed by a phone call to head office.. In order to prove me wrong, I would seriously be doubting his sanity.

@Fontofnoknowledge
You can't compare buying shaving foam and razors to condoms and lube!

OP yes, it's odd behaviour to buy abroad and I agree with the other poster who said if it was a money saving thing like he said why buy so little. Sorry 💐

Butterfly44 I disagree. Whilst the condoms and lube remain unopened/unused they are just more toiletries. It's the use of them that creates the significance.

The purchase of them would also be a cause of interest if it were not something usually purchased. This however is not the case. The OP and her DH use the items bought and must therefore purchase on a fairly regular basis.

I really can't get my head into this paranoia. Man buys condom and lube when abroad, brings it home. (Unopened.) Whereupon his partner, (with whom he uses condoms and lube) turns all Sherlock Holmes because he has said he got it at the local store.

There is a very logical explanation for this behaviour if the OP has been given reason to believe her partner cheats or is a serial cheat. Ultimately, 'proving' that he has lied about the purchase achieves nothing. You either trust him , in which case such behaviour is bonkers or you don't, and you need to end it because 'proving' he didn't buy something at the local Saver shop doesn't 'prove' he shagged around in Romania. It does however 'prove' that you believe it is something he would do. Why would anyone remain with someone they have such little trust in ? It's no way to live.

It is, indeed, funny to me to imagine that someone would call a national office to check on condom brands.

It’s simple - if there is no writing in English - it wasn’t sold here.

And - a man buying condoms at 3/pack and only two packs in a poor country is only doing it for one reason.
These are the unused leftovers.
He is stupid to bring them back.

Some discount shops do sell stuff from overseas - Poundland and Home Bargain spring to mind. Maybe he got the shop wrong, and just knew he got them from a cheap shop.

Surely if he was cheating he wouldn't openly add his secret condoms and lube to the box you keep the condoms in at home? Would he be that brazen?

Right...
H was traveling abroad, condoms w/o English labelling appeared...
Most likely conclusion - he bought the UK. Or course 😂

Even ethnic shops have to put English stickers on goods brought over. Regulations, health&safety, etc.

The small size/pack is the key here. He didn’t buy family sized to save money. He bought - ‘playing around’ size.

And stupidly brought the unused ones home. Frugality isn’t his friend.

Is he habitually a massive cheapskate?

It seems beyond reason to bring such "evidence" home unless he is so cheap he would risk his marriage, or so innocent that he would assume you're pleased about the bargain he picked up.