This is my first time posting anything on anywhere but reading other posts had supported me greatly in the past and Iām looking for advice what to do next.
So Let me tell you what Iāve been through.
I met my now fiancƩ 10 years ago we were young and I already had an 18 month old boy I was getting over breaking up from my ex (boys father) he was a taxi driver and cheated on me with his client. I met this man and we fell completely head over heals for each other things were fantastic he picked me up from a dark time made me and DS feel special and part of a family.
Things were great and pretty much stayed like that for 8 years we bought a house we both got good jobs and supported each other got engaged then 2 and a half years ago I feel pregnant we had been trying for 7 months and we were overjoyed. 7 months into my pregnancy anxiety hit me like a ton of bricks I was a wreck but got through it until baby was 3 months old then our relationship started to break down I got depression and it took a lot of work to get out of it but We pulled through. Fast forward to now. Now Iām 4 months pregnant and things were great until about 2 weeks ago. I noticed DP going to the gym a lot 4/5 times a week. He would keep his phone next to him at all times and take regular trips away for work. I knew deep down inside that something was up confronted him and was told itās your hormones, your paranoid I think you should see someone again and like a fool I believed him oh yes he was up to no good alright. Last Monday i asked DP to take a day annual leave so we could take the 2 kids to the zoo the eldest now 11 had teacher training day and the littleun loves the zoo I was told I canāt I have no time left so I shrugged it off. Wednesday came and he was taking a trip to London for work he said to me that it was a casual meeting and that it was jeans and jumper wear and even asked if he looked fit and he did that was that he went and came back late. Saturday he asks to go to his brothers to watch the footy I agreed he said he would be back at 9 he wasnāt I called him and asked where he was āwhy does it matter?ā
Who are you with? āIt doesnāt matterā
And put the phone down on me now Iām going insane so I look on his I pad And check his emails tucked away in the trash was an email confirming his booking for an adventure day at a nearby forest for the Wednesday just past for 2 ppl. I check his work phone that has his diary on it and there it was Wednesday 26th sep ANNUAL LEAVE I try to call him no answer. He stumbles in at 1am pist and I send him to the spare bed knowing he was comatose I get his phone and my heart sunk messages from a girl at work a pic
ādonāt i look cuteā
āI miss you alreadyā
āYour awesomeā
With a ton of kisses I look at his photos and there they are about 50 photos of this girl her breasts her erm snatch videos of her playing with herself head shots pouting I get him up and chuck him out we have spoken since and he said it was nothing just photos and txts he admitted to taking her out on the Wednesday and paying Ā£66 for them to go money out of our family fund he denies being with her that night but my gut tells me his lying I find out after a lot of digging that this has been going on for about 3 months and that his her manager at work.
There is no way I can get over this the trust has completely gone and the deceit had cut deep what do I do? we have a house to sort out my eldest has just started secondary school I have the 20 week scan next week having him near me makes my skin crawl he made me think I was crazy and Iām scared the depression will come back itās such a mess Iāve found out so much more but too much to write