How to I get some self respect

[Feelafool88]

I am so disappointed in myself

Broke off a stupid on off thing a few weeks ago it was obvious the guy wasn’t as into me as I was to him.

He got in contact this week and boom last night we meet up have sex and then he runs out the door straight after

I have spent today staring at my phone wanting him to contact which of course he won’t why do I do this!!!! How can I get some self respect really hating myself right now 😫

It's difficult I know.

I think your only option is to block him. He can't contact you when he's feeling horny then. This will take courage but it's better than HIM dropping YOU for good when he meets someone with whom he wants to be in a relationship.

We all slip up so don't be hard on yourself.
Hopefully it was an enjoyable encounter so put it down to an memorable experience.
Agree with PP. Delete messages and number or block.

I was so embarrassed last night he was all ill
Stay over we’ll
Have a nice night then boom basically ran out

Block him and any others like him. Keep telling yourself you're worth more than being a booty call.

Definitely block him. But do you know why you keep repeating this cycle and what you need to address within yourself to be happy? Best of luck.

I think it helps to own your choices more and change your inner monologue accordingly. So, instead of saying to yourself:

"...stupid... it was obvious the guy wasn’t... into me... we meet up have sex and then he runs out the door straight after... wanting him to contact which of course he won’t... why do I do this!!... really hating myself..."

You could say to yourself:

"Last night was fun. I love being spontaneous! I know he's not 'the one' though and I would prefer that. I think my next man needs to be more xxx." (Or whatever.)

If you can't trust yourself around that particular guy, it's probably best to block him.

Feelafool88 you are not alone. I have done the same thing with someone I have known off & on for the last 3 years. I don't know why I allowed this to bumble on. I think partly because we are in the main platonic friends & I enjoy his company. We went long periods with no contact (my choice) with a very occasional hiccup including a recent one which has left me feeling horrible about myself. Clearly I want more and he's not going to give me that.

I agree delete and preferably block him. If you are not brave enough to do that then you could send a friend his number to 'keep' - sounds ridiculous as I write this & I am old enough to know better but a friend suggested this to me. If a friend told you she was in a relationship like this you would tell her to bin him & that's what you should do but it is hard.

You deserve so much better & it shall stop you being with someone lovely. Probably like you I have no idea why I allow this as I am confident / independent in all other aspects of my life. Sorry no great advice just wanted to say you are not alone!

Yes block him,he'll try and get back in contact when he wants the same again. Tough. Remember how he made you feel, just learn and move on... I'm sure he wasn't that great!

Tbh the sex the past two times haven’t been great anyway. And he doesn’t make me feel good about myself but I am so drawn to him. I can’t even be angry at him because he has told me he doesn’t want any commitment so it’s my own fault although he does know how I feel about him.

I just don’t understand why I allow it...I have had two lovely guys ask me out and I’m
Just not interested because they aren’t him

Are you scared to committing to something / somebody new or don't want commitment ? Which made him somehow more appealing

Hey @Sandandsea that is a great approach!

Are you scared of lovely guys and used to being a booty call as it's safer emotionally?

He is the first guy I’ve ever allowed to treat me like this my last relationship ended badly ten years and he was cheating on me at the end but as soon as I found out he’d cheated I left him.