I'm pregnant and he's announced he doesn't want any more children...

[ShakenSally]

I'm 35 weeks pregnant and DH thought it a good time to announce that he doesn't want any more children after this one (I want more than one). He already has a 9 year old DD.

I'm torn. Trying to look forward to the birth of our baby but now feeling deeply saddened that if I want another I would have to leave DP in the future. I don't think he is going to change his mind.

He always said he wanted two more, he's now changed his mind and only wants this one. Fair enough, we are all allowed to change our minds, but how do I cope with this?

Really finding it hard to come to terms with and feel like it was a cruel/pointless time to tell me.

How would you deal with this internally?

I would revisit this once your baby is born and older. It’s not a good time to make a rational decision and could be based on fear/finances/anxiety as it’s so close to your due date, your partner could be feeling anxious. It’s not very nice of him to have announced this the way he has before birth but ask him if you can talk about it in 6 months to a year?

@PookieDo I think that's a good idea. I just wish he hadn't mentioned it. Ignorance really is bliss sometimes and I don't now want to be thinking 'oh, this might be the last time I get to do this with DP' throughout my whole maternity leave. I'm so emotionally wired at the moment and am really struggling with his revelation.

A year sounds like a good amount of time. I so wish he just didn't say anything.

fgs this is all I can think about I just want to erase his comment from my memory

Have you asked why the change of heart? Maybe if you know the reason you can talk through it.

Also maybe if he understands you definetly want more...he might change his mind.

If my DH has said that to me while pregnant...I would have made it clear I never wanted to have just one child and his new decision means our relationship would be ending.

It would have been non negotiable. He's entitled to change his mind and I'm entitled to end the marriage on the basis if his change of mind.

It may well be because of the stress and worry of the last weeks of pregnancy. I was bloody certain that I wouldnt want another with each of mine during the last month or so, and the first 3 months. I now have 6 and I would have had more but for health concerns.

I agree that asking to revisit the issue in a year or so would be a good idea, and explain how him saying that at this point in your pregnancy was insensitive in the extreme and how much it has upset you.